tEa TiMe!!!
Saturday, April 30, 2005
la la la la...1 more!
haha... it was just a momentary envy.
im happy for my ex-crush. at least he is moving on...haha i happen to know beforehand na he had a girlfriend. But since he is falling in love again, well, he is definitely giving love a second chance. I'm happy for him... and yeah, i got the chance to talk to him and he was all smiles. i think he was going to play tennis with that girl. BTW, yung type niya pala sa isang girl, as how i perceived it, is yung sporty din like him, and a good conversationalist or at least funny...
haha... neways, i'm happy now...^_^seriously, I am.
but im sad kasi SS is over... I really liked my SS. The only module that I enjoyed studying. and my study period was like one day lang! #_# how i wished it was a week so I could leisurely read all the stuff, and critically ponder on the things being said.
and one more! MARKETING!
tuesday, i will patiently wait for you , and my Lord will sustain me by then and even afterwards! YES, ONE MORE! IT ISN'T TOO BAD. NOW I MUST FACE THE PRESENT, I MUST START STUDYING! from square 1! *LOL* ¶ 1:54 PM 0 comments
im happy for my ex-crush. at least he is moving on...haha i happen to know beforehand na he had a girlfriend. But since he is falling in love again, well, he is definitely giving love a second chance. I'm happy for him... and yeah, i got the chance to talk to him and he was all smiles. i think he was going to play tennis with that girl. BTW, yung type niya pala sa isang girl, as how i perceived it, is yung sporty din like him, and a good conversationalist or at least funny...
haha... neways, i'm happy now...^_^seriously, I am.
but im sad kasi SS is over... I really liked my SS. The only module that I enjoyed studying. and my study period was like one day lang! #_# how i wished it was a week so I could leisurely read all the stuff, and critically ponder on the things being said.
and one more! MARKETING!
tuesday, i will patiently wait for you , and my Lord will sustain me by then and even afterwards! YES, ONE MORE! IT ISN'T TOO BAD. NOW I MUST FACE THE PRESENT, I MUST START STUDYING! from square 1! *LOL* ¶ 1:54 PM 0 comments
Friday, April 29, 2005
GOSH! the thing i feared to happen is happening!
MY EX-CRUSH IS FALLING IN LOVE WITH THAT GIRL!
AND I'M BY AND LARGE FEELING THIS ENVY.
HAHAHA...
She's lucky.
I'm not.
But I'm blessed with His grace... So i better hold on to that powerful realm than trying to save my somehow salvaged sanity by doing something about it... or whatever...haha...
smile! it's the least i can do for my ambitious heart not coupled with action.
over over... as easy as that?
hmm... just don't let me see them doing some PDA at this point of time, then I'll be glad and will happily uninvolve myself. At least give me some time to accept it... And yeah, it is one of the battles that I never fought. I'm actually not really concerned about it. Or so I think. I just feel this thing...yung sayang... i had a lot of chances of getting to know him way better that i simply threw away because of the things that must be kept until it is time. Oh ivy, withdraw yourself!
paper paper tomorrow! ¶ 10:51 PM 0 comments
AND I'M BY AND LARGE FEELING THIS ENVY.
HAHAHA...
She's lucky.
I'm not.
But I'm blessed with His grace... So i better hold on to that powerful realm than trying to save my somehow salvaged sanity by doing something about it... or whatever...haha...
smile! it's the least i can do for my ambitious heart not coupled with action.
over over... as easy as that?
hmm... just don't let me see them doing some PDA at this point of time, then I'll be glad and will happily uninvolve myself. At least give me some time to accept it... And yeah, it is one of the battles that I never fought. I'm actually not really concerned about it. Or so I think. I just feel this thing...yung sayang... i had a lot of chances of getting to know him way better that i simply threw away because of the things that must be kept until it is time. Oh ivy, withdraw yourself!
paper paper tomorrow! ¶ 10:51 PM 0 comments
Tom Cruise dating Katie Holmes?
haha... hollywood...
I guess in a more zingy approach, I daresay hollywood is an adulterous place... or at least as based on how the bible defines adultery. People marry here and there, divorce here and there, and marry here and there again, and say they have loved this and that... Uhm, i do doubt though... They did love, but are they really able to distinguish between love and just temporal infatuation or more overtly obsession/lust? Liberalism going to the extremes. Gone are the ethics and age-old morales. The world is sullen.
And geez, I have to receive two different predictions of the future both saying that by 2010 or 2009 troubles start. That's like after I graduate college. haha... ryt... I'm not that shocked though because it is only expected at this rate --> of the world dynamically redefining its morales and judgements into worldly inclinations. Yes, redefining them to be proper and right in the basis of what they deem practical and reasonable. i.e. Gay is right? Hmmm, i think that's misinterpreting or rather the loss in the battle of that search for identity stage. You thought you were a girl, when most probably the charateristics that you have noticed from yourself are just your feminine side (or as how we culturally define it). It's not wrong to manifest those, they are natural. What's wrong is to utterly lose out to that thought and declare that you are what you are not and eventually become what you are not supposed to be AND declare to the world that you are what you are now and what you are supposed to be. [unless you are bisexual of course, you have to rely on your emotions and well the dominance of whichever sexuality manifested in your body] Gosh! that's naively abashing yourself in front of Him! You are proud of the falseness of your being! (or in a way something like that)... No it's not human rights or whatever case... There's got to be a bound to that freedom. People have gone too far. Too much ideals going the unnatural [wrong] way...
What's wrong with that?
dunno exactly, it's just my gut feeling that there's a big deal of wrong there. it is not how we are supposed to live. it's against the natural order of the universe in the athiest term. But in terms of the truth in the Bible, it is forbidden....
haha...neways
enough of that. I must be aggitating the so-called gay people. It's just my currently perceived view on the issue and the degredation going on. There's freedom of speech anyway, just as they had their freedom of choice... ¶ 3:14 AM 0 comments
I guess in a more zingy approach, I daresay hollywood is an adulterous place... or at least as based on how the bible defines adultery. People marry here and there, divorce here and there, and marry here and there again, and say they have loved this and that... Uhm, i do doubt though... They did love, but are they really able to distinguish between love and just temporal infatuation or more overtly obsession/lust? Liberalism going to the extremes. Gone are the ethics and age-old morales. The world is sullen.
And geez, I have to receive two different predictions of the future both saying that by 2010 or 2009 troubles start. That's like after I graduate college. haha... ryt... I'm not that shocked though because it is only expected at this rate --> of the world dynamically redefining its morales and judgements into worldly inclinations. Yes, redefining them to be proper and right in the basis of what they deem practical and reasonable. i.e. Gay is right? Hmmm, i think that's misinterpreting or rather the loss in the battle of that search for identity stage. You thought you were a girl, when most probably the charateristics that you have noticed from yourself are just your feminine side (or as how we culturally define it). It's not wrong to manifest those, they are natural. What's wrong is to utterly lose out to that thought and declare that you are what you are not and eventually become what you are not supposed to be AND declare to the world that you are what you are now and what you are supposed to be. [unless you are bisexual of course, you have to rely on your emotions and well the dominance of whichever sexuality manifested in your body] Gosh! that's naively abashing yourself in front of Him! You are proud of the falseness of your being! (or in a way something like that)... No it's not human rights or whatever case... There's got to be a bound to that freedom. People have gone too far. Too much ideals going the unnatural [wrong] way...
What's wrong with that?
dunno exactly, it's just my gut feeling that there's a big deal of wrong there. it is not how we are supposed to live. it's against the natural order of the universe in the athiest term. But in terms of the truth in the Bible, it is forbidden....
haha...neways
enough of that. I must be aggitating the so-called gay people. It's just my currently perceived view on the issue and the degredation going on. There's freedom of speech anyway, just as they had their freedom of choice... ¶ 3:14 AM 0 comments
Sunday, April 24, 2005
i didn't go...
for my youth group neither for the meeting in the sister's house
after being drained mentally for two days and sleeping my night away (my alarm failed me or i guess it's the otherwise that happened since i failed to set it properly), I should have gone there instead. But who knows, maybe I needed the rest too. Although, I'm quite sad to choose not to. Anyway, God understands. It's part of my human limitations.
I just had my physics finals 10 hours ago. The Lord encouraged me to face it. I was really scared beforehand because if i fail my finals, then I would surely fail the module. I didn't do my best though, I just rambled all the stuff there and got lost in some items but I'm hoping for the best, to pass and keep my scholarship. But I guess I'm judging too soon. I still got four more papers to struggle with. Maths, Electrical for my engin core modules, and my SS and Marketing both require hundreds and hundreds of pages of reading. I'm really troubled how to go about them. But yes, in the Lord's time, everything will be alright. and yes, I will hope in the Lord. These things may not make sense now, but to Him, they all play a part in His plans. =)
and to Chin, I do not know if she reads this, I'd like to say, I'm proud of you! hehe... whatever happened, we will always be here. We are all unworthy of His love, that's why it is grace that keeps us alive. Also, the love of parents for their children are irrevocable and noble and true^_^, but then even if there may be instances (one out of gazzillions!) that it fails [we are blessed that it is not in your case or mine], His love for us never will and so is His faithfulness.
Reminds me of the time my ate told me to just cry everything out ^_^. Just cry when you have to, but don't meddle too much on the problem. Learn from it and move on. I actually cry when my family forgives me for my misgivings. Indeed,their love is much much greater than everything I have done altogether. However, I'm the type of person who doesn't like to cry in public, as much as possible, I hold my tears back. I'm also the type who doesn't cry when somebody else is. I fear I might repress the person even more because I cried...haha... i just realized that it can be comforting as well ^_^. Sometimes when I break out. I break out. I cry anyway. Girls cry in public, boys rarely do that. ^_^. But I'm impressed by males who can bravely show their emotions because they (i therefore speculate) don't care about the image they project in public. Culture tells them not to cry. But really, what are your tear glands for? They are not there for display or some form of waste secretion, sometimes when you really can't take it, just let it all out. You will feel better afterwards (no wonder girls do it! haha)...
anyways, i managed to turn on my webcam after the longest time. My pix software is broken so I used yahoo messenger instead to take pix! hehe... i'm kinda narcissistic in a way... BUT BUT i cannot bring my webcam around and take picture of others so I only have myself, my stuff and my room to take photos with! but if only I have a cam, i would love to take pictures of my friends and of the world! really! haha... but anyway again, priorities and priorities. Digicam and cellphones with cam are just vanities. Marketing people just make them appear to be a need . Haha I actually learned something from my marketing module ^_^. Well, actually according to my first lecture notes, marketers capitalize on needs and invest on wants. They also try turning wants to needs through promotions... Therefore, be warned! do not be deceived by what the ads say as important. They are just trying to earn some bucks ^_^ but really, know your realistic and actual priorities, there and then you'll realize what you really need. ^_^
here are some samples of my pix during the severe mugging period (after waking up realizing that I should have gone to one of the meetings I mentioned earlier):
hmmm... i slept for five hours! it's like the whole time i could have spent in the meetings...
reminisce the past...remember those effigy days?
i like this one... i look bewildered ^_^ by something
[different day photo, sometime like several weeks ago]
I'm really wondering why models don't smile that much... I tried to imitate them, but... HAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHA HAHAHHAHAA HAHHAHAHAHHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
stop dreamin baby! =P
haha...
God bless! ¶ 12:04 AM 1 comments
after being drained mentally for two days and sleeping my night away (my alarm failed me or i guess it's the otherwise that happened since i failed to set it properly), I should have gone there instead. But who knows, maybe I needed the rest too. Although, I'm quite sad to choose not to. Anyway, God understands. It's part of my human limitations.
I just had my physics finals 10 hours ago. The Lord encouraged me to face it. I was really scared beforehand because if i fail my finals, then I would surely fail the module. I didn't do my best though, I just rambled all the stuff there and got lost in some items but I'm hoping for the best, to pass and keep my scholarship. But I guess I'm judging too soon. I still got four more papers to struggle with. Maths, Electrical for my engin core modules, and my SS and Marketing both require hundreds and hundreds of pages of reading. I'm really troubled how to go about them. But yes, in the Lord's time, everything will be alright. and yes, I will hope in the Lord. These things may not make sense now, but to Him, they all play a part in His plans. =)
and to Chin, I do not know if she reads this, I'd like to say, I'm proud of you! hehe... whatever happened, we will always be here. We are all unworthy of His love, that's why it is grace that keeps us alive. Also, the love of parents for their children are irrevocable and noble and true^_^, but then even if there may be instances (one out of gazzillions!) that it fails [we are blessed that it is not in your case or mine], His love for us never will and so is His faithfulness.
Reminds me of the time my ate told me to just cry everything out ^_^. Just cry when you have to, but don't meddle too much on the problem. Learn from it and move on. I actually cry when my family forgives me for my misgivings. Indeed,their love is much much greater than everything I have done altogether. However, I'm the type of person who doesn't like to cry in public, as much as possible, I hold my tears back. I'm also the type who doesn't cry when somebody else is. I fear I might repress the person even more because I cried...haha... i just realized that it can be comforting as well ^_^. Sometimes when I break out. I break out. I cry anyway. Girls cry in public, boys rarely do that. ^_^. But I'm impressed by males who can bravely show their emotions because they (i therefore speculate) don't care about the image they project in public. Culture tells them not to cry. But really, what are your tear glands for? They are not there for display or some form of waste secretion, sometimes when you really can't take it, just let it all out. You will feel better afterwards (no wonder girls do it! haha)...
anyways, i managed to turn on my webcam after the longest time. My pix software is broken so I used yahoo messenger instead to take pix! hehe... i'm kinda narcissistic in a way... BUT BUT i cannot bring my webcam around and take picture of others so I only have myself, my stuff and my room to take photos with! but if only I have a cam, i would love to take pictures of my friends and of the world! really! haha... but anyway again, priorities and priorities. Digicam and cellphones with cam are just vanities. Marketing people just make them appear to be a need . Haha I actually learned something from my marketing module ^_^. Well, actually according to my first lecture notes, marketers capitalize on needs and invest on wants. They also try turning wants to needs through promotions... Therefore, be warned! do not be deceived by what the ads say as important. They are just trying to earn some bucks ^_^ but really, know your realistic and actual priorities, there and then you'll realize what you really need. ^_^
here are some samples of my pix during the severe mugging period (after waking up realizing that I should have gone to one of the meetings I mentioned earlier):
hmmm... i slept for five hours! it's like the whole time i could have spent in the meetings...
reminisce the past...remember those effigy days?
i like this one... i look bewildered ^_^ by something
[different day photo, sometime like several weeks ago]
I'm really wondering why models don't smile that much... I tried to imitate them, but... HAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHA HAHAHHAHAA HAHHAHAHAHHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
stop dreamin baby! =P
haha...
God bless! ¶ 12:04 AM 1 comments
Saturday, April 23, 2005
Friday, April 22, 2005
a post of apology (about my CS final paper)
sorry Dr. Tan and Mr. Tan, I have readily lost 30 points because I'm a slow writer and a stubborn child who didn't heed the advice of my Marketing Tutor. I should have started in the last part, indeed, i have encouontered the thought but i still started in the MCQ part because i was just too stubborn and indecisive to take such an unusual step (for me that is), to start from the back and end in front... Sigh, it was really the unwisest thing I've ever done, to neglect the most obvious choice because i didn't even bother about the end result since it didn't happen yet. But now, it did. Yes, i readily lost 30 points for the few blank pages that actually weighed more than the MCQs altogether. I'm sorry Dr. Tan and Mr. Tan. Don't blame yourself if i got a very low grade, it wasn't you. You guys and my tutor are really very good teachers. Your final paper questions were actually do-able, and fair enough. It's really just me and I'm so sorry for myself to learn it the painful and hard way.
--end--
And now i look unto Jesus for comfort. Before i left my room, i heard these: "there's much more in this life"--> lyrics of a Christian music. Indeed, there is much more in this life than to meddle on such a foolish action, i hope to learn from this and i hope to move on. But oh Lord, I know You allow things to happen as long as they don't go against Your Will. It was apparently my choice to fail, I was just too complacent. But I know, everything is under Your control. Whether i may end up not taking the path I'm currently taking or not, or with flying colors or not, Lord, everything is still under Your control. Everything will be alright. I thank You for You and Your great love. =) ¶ 6:30 PM 0 comments
--end--
And now i look unto Jesus for comfort. Before i left my room, i heard these: "there's much more in this life"--> lyrics of a Christian music. Indeed, there is much more in this life than to meddle on such a foolish action, i hope to learn from this and i hope to move on. But oh Lord, I know You allow things to happen as long as they don't go against Your Will. It was apparently my choice to fail, I was just too complacent. But I know, everything is under Your control. Whether i may end up not taking the path I'm currently taking or not, or with flying colors or not, Lord, everything is still under Your control. Everything will be alright. I thank You for You and Your great love. =) ¶ 6:30 PM 0 comments
Thursday, April 21, 2005
i missed a lot!
*LOL*
can't help but laugh and stare in awe at the forum discussions (yep, my first time to visit for the whole sem and i really really missed a lot of life there!)... SS2211 is indeed the most interesting module i have so far. It is so critically designed and you get to enjoy history stuff in a critical way in layman's terms, i mean, you understand it as a person. And being human plays a big part in that understanding. Psychology plays the biggest part, it's fun and i recommend it to those who have not taken SS yet. It's definitely an interesting history module!
anyway, some excerpts from the discussions:
* some student asked about the the terms Temasek and Singapura
*some OTHER student added that : "'temasek' is derived from 'temasik' and 'singapore' from 'singapura'. i'm not too sure whether 'temasik' refers to the trading and fishing settlement that developed on the island or the entire island itself. as for 'singapura', it seems to refer to the entire island. can anyone help me with this? thanks. "
*somebody started it off: " In Malay , Singa means lion , and I think pura might mean fish or fish tail? Then the Singapura would mean lion-head fish~... lolz "
*the another somebody tried to correct the previous student:"i think pura means city or town"
*somebody threw fire in the wall!: " Actually... 'pura' is short for 'pura-pura' or tortoise, not fish... One point to make... If I remember correctly, 'SINGAPURA' did not exist until the British arrived. The term 'SINGAPURA' was never used to describe Temasik until much later... most definitely NOT when Temasik was first founded... "
*LOL*
*finally the professor wasn't able to take it: "Singa means lion, and pura means city. By the way, you guys are really cracking me up with all your discussions. Do keep it up! "
haha...for this one, he really cracked up! these guys don't only have the wits, really they amaze me with their very impressive discussions, they can come up with funny ones too ^_^. Cool people =). I like my SSA2211 class!
and another one was this discussion about whether to submit the assignment as handwritten or not; it was quite a long thread and eventually almost everybody who posted considered handwritten to be okay or permissible. If only my tutor did not react, then there could have been handwritten essays submitted. ^_^I bet it would be tougher to mark that.
hehe...silly stuff before my first ever paper! tom! ^_^
In the Lord's hands I will entrust all of these =). ¶ 9:49 PM 0 comments
can't help but laugh and stare in awe at the forum discussions (yep, my first time to visit for the whole sem and i really really missed a lot of life there!)... SS2211 is indeed the most interesting module i have so far. It is so critically designed and you get to enjoy history stuff in a critical way in layman's terms, i mean, you understand it as a person. And being human plays a big part in that understanding. Psychology plays the biggest part, it's fun and i recommend it to those who have not taken SS yet. It's definitely an interesting history module!
anyway, some excerpts from the discussions:
* some student asked about the the terms Temasek and Singapura
*some OTHER student added that : "'temasek' is derived from 'temasik' and 'singapore' from 'singapura'. i'm not too sure whether 'temasik' refers to the trading and fishing settlement that developed on the island or the entire island itself. as for 'singapura', it seems to refer to the entire island. can anyone help me with this? thanks. "
*somebody started it off: " In Malay , Singa means lion , and I think pura might mean fish or fish tail? Then the Singapura would mean lion-head fish~... lolz "
*the another somebody tried to correct the previous student:"i think pura means city or town"
*somebody threw fire in the wall!: " Actually... 'pura' is short for 'pura-pura' or tortoise, not fish... One point to make... If I remember correctly, 'SINGAPURA' did not exist until the British arrived. The term 'SINGAPURA' was never used to describe Temasik until much later... most definitely NOT when Temasik was first founded... "
*LOL*
*finally the professor wasn't able to take it: "Singa means lion, and pura means city. By the way, you guys are really cracking me up with all your discussions. Do keep it up! "
haha...for this one, he really cracked up! these guys don't only have the wits, really they amaze me with their very impressive discussions, they can come up with funny ones too ^_^. Cool people =). I like my SSA2211 class!
and another one was this discussion about whether to submit the assignment as handwritten or not; it was quite a long thread and eventually almost everybody who posted considered handwritten to be okay or permissible. If only my tutor did not react, then there could have been handwritten essays submitted. ^_^I bet it would be tougher to mark that.
hehe...silly stuff before my first ever paper! tom! ^_^
In the Lord's hands I will entrust all of these =). ¶ 9:49 PM 0 comments
Tuesday, April 19, 2005
it's over
thank God!
but my finals aren't over! haven't even started! now i have to brace myself for a bit less obstacle in my way back home... argh.... my mind cannot absorb! i need the powers of those infrasonic minded people! haha... a.k.a. super-brainer people who doesn't really study, or those who actually study in their dreams =P... (exaggerated!)
anyway, i feel numb, i don't feel like excelling or at least im not intimidated by the possibility that I'll land somewhere below the mediocre standards. and to think, mediocre standards is already too mediocre (because of curving), so all the more if i fall below it! worse is to actually flunk the whole thing! #_#
6 PAPERS!
May the Lord be with us always! ¶ 2:46 AM 0 comments
but my finals aren't over! haven't even started! now i have to brace myself for a bit less obstacle in my way back home... argh.... my mind cannot absorb! i need the powers of those infrasonic minded people! haha... a.k.a. super-brainer people who doesn't really study, or those who actually study in their dreams =P... (exaggerated!)
anyway, i feel numb, i don't feel like excelling or at least im not intimidated by the possibility that I'll land somewhere below the mediocre standards. and to think, mediocre standards is already too mediocre (because of curving), so all the more if i fall below it! worse is to actually flunk the whole thing! #_#
6 PAPERS!
May the Lord be with us always! ¶ 2:46 AM 0 comments
Monday, April 18, 2005
=(
everybody's mugging hard
i fell to a halt
i ran out of purpose
why?
if there is one thing i want God to grant me this moment
it is a ticket home
but anyway, I know God has a plan for everything
I cannot escape and must take my final papers
But I can concentrate no longer
I just want to write whatever on the paper
leave the exam halls
pack my stuff then head home!
yes people cry here and there without telling me why
I will cry too until maybe my eyes gets too sullen for tears to come out
In fact I cried but that wouldn't stop the world
I won't even bother to stop the world
As if it would bother to stop just to stop me from crying
Anyway, whatever the case...
I just want to stop this nonsense
My nonsense...
my Father understands and so is my father somewhere out there
I am swollen hearted although a while ago I was gay
I just want to cry that's all
And it's nothing...
Nothing to worry about...
It's just me
and its been ages since I last cried like this
like maybe 2-3 or 5 years ago
so i kinda miss the feeling =P
I cry for nothing...
I somberly cry for nothing...
I'm even disclosing it here!
so it is really nothing!
so don't even bother to ask
just go on living.
I am a joke.
If you can tell my ate not to cry, then most probably I'd stop...
Ate tells me to cry eh! so what can I do?
She cried, then I cry
But Uncle says don't cry...
Uncle's right and he has all the reasons to be right
but still I cry coz ate cried
my ate needs strength
since I am not home, i cannot share her burden
then I just cry for being helpless
i pray
i cry
i pray
i stop cry
i want not study
i want home.
P.S.
ate just slept
she stop cry
i stop cry
^_^
blasted english! =P
yes, this is a season of testing... may our faith keep us holding on!
May the Lord always be with us!
Amen! ¶ 12:35 AM 0 comments
i fell to a halt
i ran out of purpose
why?
if there is one thing i want God to grant me this moment
it is a ticket home
but anyway, I know God has a plan for everything
I cannot escape and must take my final papers
But I can concentrate no longer
I just want to write whatever on the paper
leave the exam halls
pack my stuff then head home!
yes people cry here and there without telling me why
I will cry too until maybe my eyes gets too sullen for tears to come out
In fact I cried but that wouldn't stop the world
I won't even bother to stop the world
As if it would bother to stop just to stop me from crying
Anyway, whatever the case...
I just want to stop this nonsense
My nonsense...
my Father understands and so is my father somewhere out there
I am swollen hearted although a while ago I was gay
I just want to cry that's all
And it's nothing...
Nothing to worry about...
It's just me
and its been ages since I last cried like this
like maybe 2-3 or 5 years ago
so i kinda miss the feeling =P
I cry for nothing...
I somberly cry for nothing...
I'm even disclosing it here!
so it is really nothing!
so don't even bother to ask
just go on living.
I am a joke.
If you can tell my ate not to cry, then most probably I'd stop...
Ate tells me to cry eh! so what can I do?
She cried, then I cry
But Uncle says don't cry...
Uncle's right and he has all the reasons to be right
but still I cry coz ate cried
my ate needs strength
since I am not home, i cannot share her burden
then I just cry for being helpless
i pray
i cry
i pray
i stop cry
i want not study
i want home.
P.S.
ate just slept
she stop cry
i stop cry
^_^
blasted english! =P
yes, this is a season of testing... may our faith keep us holding on!
May the Lord always be with us!
Amen! ¶ 12:35 AM 0 comments
Saturday, April 16, 2005
call me odd
argh... i have just seen my electrical lab grades... they're quite bad due to some pathetic mistakes!
anyway, gotta vent such a "frustration" here before they sulk up and stop me from continuing my ever delayed mugging.
and why is it that my new ex-crush is so good? i don't know i recently feel challenged when i think of him, and get discouraged afterwards. He doesn't study that much but he's excelling fairly well, and better than me, who is trying hard to get focused... Is it because he is older? yah, he's 21... or 22 #_# and has a relatively higher maturity compared to usual Singaporean males of his age and maybe have studied a lot (more years i mean), but... i somehow feel intimidated. He is so good! Does he characterize the typical engineering student? and am i but a civilian bystander who happen to get involved in the engineering wagon?
it was yesterday that i told Kor, I'm glad i changed my faculty to engineering. Yeah, I still am glad in a way but i can't help but get this intimidated. Its possible that my other day's absence in the most crucial SS lecture spurred some "arghness" in me. The relevance? uhm, i'd rather keep that to myself...hehehe... it's actually pathetic... Anyway, i just feel that way, and hopefully would forget about it after this post...hehe...
---digressing---
I'm not sure if Singapore made me more mature; i somehow think i'm more immature now... haha... but in a way i get to see some better side of things, and even began to appreciate the funny side of being shallow; and sometimes the vanity in the things i do. Somehow, they're definitive of a person, but somehow as well, psychologically speaking, you could understand why others get hooked to a petty thing and eventually you'd realize that you are already hooked too. I don't know, i just find it funny yet complicated. God's works are amazing. So awesome that no matter how i try to understand people, i'll never get the gist even at least the grasp of the thing. I just keep on accepting and just reckoning and revising my mindset in retrospect, i.e. people can do this too, and that because maybe this or that and then later maybe this or that, it's okay, fairly acceptable because blah blah blah...
anyway, whatever the case maybe, me mature or immature, the world doesn't revolve around me and the story of my life really isn't about the me, so i better stop MEing here ^_^ . In other words, I gotta stop this and go to sleep before my brain vomits everything i just learned! haha... i just read my CS1101C notes and speaking of retrospect, yes, i learned the lessons from my notes in retrospect, actual experience of heady errors, no wonder i made pathetic mistakes in the tests! (and experienced some migrains while doing the labs!) I never really read my notes!
neways!
God bless!
P.S. Yep i may be cynic in many of my posts (i think i am ^_^), but they're just thoughts. =). I write them here to keep track probably but my dear God is always there to comfort me everytime. ¶ 2:34 AM 0 comments
anyway, gotta vent such a "frustration" here before they sulk up and stop me from continuing my ever delayed mugging.
and why is it that my new ex-crush is so good? i don't know i recently feel challenged when i think of him, and get discouraged afterwards. He doesn't study that much but he's excelling fairly well, and better than me, who is trying hard to get focused... Is it because he is older? yah, he's 21... or 22 #_# and has a relatively higher maturity compared to usual Singaporean males of his age and maybe have studied a lot (more years i mean), but... i somehow feel intimidated. He is so good! Does he characterize the typical engineering student? and am i but a civilian bystander who happen to get involved in the engineering wagon?
it was yesterday that i told Kor, I'm glad i changed my faculty to engineering. Yeah, I still am glad in a way but i can't help but get this intimidated. Its possible that my other day's absence in the most crucial SS lecture spurred some "arghness" in me. The relevance? uhm, i'd rather keep that to myself...hehehe... it's actually pathetic... Anyway, i just feel that way, and hopefully would forget about it after this post...hehe...
---digressing---
I'm not sure if Singapore made me more mature; i somehow think i'm more immature now... haha... but in a way i get to see some better side of things, and even began to appreciate the funny side of being shallow; and sometimes the vanity in the things i do. Somehow, they're definitive of a person, but somehow as well, psychologically speaking, you could understand why others get hooked to a petty thing and eventually you'd realize that you are already hooked too. I don't know, i just find it funny yet complicated. God's works are amazing. So awesome that no matter how i try to understand people, i'll never get the gist even at least the grasp of the thing. I just keep on accepting and just reckoning and revising my mindset in retrospect, i.e. people can do this too, and that because maybe this or that and then later maybe this or that, it's okay, fairly acceptable because blah blah blah...
anyway, whatever the case maybe, me mature or immature, the world doesn't revolve around me and the story of my life really isn't about the me, so i better stop MEing here ^_^ . In other words, I gotta stop this and go to sleep before my brain vomits everything i just learned! haha... i just read my CS1101C notes and speaking of retrospect, yes, i learned the lessons from my notes in retrospect, actual experience of heady errors, no wonder i made pathetic mistakes in the tests! (and experienced some migrains while doing the labs!) I never really read my notes!
neways!
God bless!
P.S. Yep i may be cynic in many of my posts (i think i am ^_^), but they're just thoughts. =). I write them here to keep track probably but my dear God is always there to comfort me everytime. ¶ 2:34 AM 0 comments
Wednesday, April 13, 2005
snappy snap
geez whiz....
just finished PE but i prefer not to spoil this post talking about it....
plainly, it, my PE for programming, was not successful....[ periods ].... yes that's the end of it!
anyway, i'm tired and drained out and behind in every aspect...
God's also busy doing His stuff on me... and yeah, i get stuffed...
He's teaching me how imperfect i am everyday and apparently events that He allowed to unfold make me disappointed of myself more and more. The call of trusting Him is there but still...
Life cannot just be simply described as sweet or maybe bitter separately... Life is indeed beautiful... A mixture of colors and blacks, perfectly combined to create a beautiful picture... All in all life is a gift, but you'll never know what's in it unless you live it, and it doesn't necessarily mean that you'll like it all the way. But the harmony, if you manage to find it, is simply wonderful...
Looking beyond all the troubles, i hope to experience the best summer of my life so far... for i just had a not-so-lonely December...
but anyway, just like what Prabs advised me once, take each step as they come... and like what God said, do not worry for tomorrow because each day has its own troubles...and like what Kor mentioned in her post many many times, God will never leave us; and also, His faithfulness is renewed everyday...
I may have started my day with an "awful" PE, i still have the rest of less than 10 hours to feel God's grace and be in a lighter mood to sleep and begin another new start =). ¶ 1:49 PM 0 comments
just finished PE but i prefer not to spoil this post talking about it....
plainly, it, my PE for programming, was not successful....[ periods ].... yes that's the end of it!
anyway, i'm tired and drained out and behind in every aspect...
God's also busy doing His stuff on me... and yeah, i get stuffed...
He's teaching me how imperfect i am everyday and apparently events that He allowed to unfold make me disappointed of myself more and more. The call of trusting Him is there but still...
Life cannot just be simply described as sweet or maybe bitter separately... Life is indeed beautiful... A mixture of colors and blacks, perfectly combined to create a beautiful picture... All in all life is a gift, but you'll never know what's in it unless you live it, and it doesn't necessarily mean that you'll like it all the way. But the harmony, if you manage to find it, is simply wonderful...
Looking beyond all the troubles, i hope to experience the best summer of my life so far... for i just had a not-so-lonely December...
but anyway, just like what Prabs advised me once, take each step as they come... and like what God said, do not worry for tomorrow because each day has its own troubles...and like what Kor mentioned in her post many many times, God will never leave us; and also, His faithfulness is renewed everyday...
I may have started my day with an "awful" PE, i still have the rest of less than 10 hours to feel God's grace and be in a lighter mood to sleep and begin another new start =). ¶ 1:49 PM 0 comments
Thursday, April 07, 2005
here are my arguments
i gave a thought to what Brice just said in the dining hall
he said something like:
when you have a low grade don't even bother asking other people's grades or else you'll feel bad. when you have a high grade you can ask people and then feel good about yourself...
I disagree... in a way you could sense self-centeredness in that claim. I'm not saying that Brice is, but the intentions can be and most likely are... Because the argument revolves around how good or bad you'd feel afterwards.
Why do I disagree? In the first place, low grades are burdens. They have to be shared to lessen their yoke on your neck. and if you think that others might belittle you, then that's simple, belittle them too if you are vengeful because they are the type of people who measures your worth to one-sided academics, and they're not really true friends at all. They are also the type who tends to go for things that would make them feel or think that they are better than others. I do not like people who thinks like that, i believe that everybody is equal in this world; one may be good in one aspect but others are better in another aspect. I take the egalitarian point of view, and which somehow gives some proof to zodiac claims... I'm a libran, a typical undecisive yet somebody who trully believes in equality, and somehow I have this strong belief that many librans share this type of view (and based on my observations as well). I'm not the astrology believer or whatever, I believe in God, but I find it interesting that zodiac signs do describe people in reality. They have a match, and I might ask Jesus about they're realness when I'll meet Him... I may tend to believe in descriptions of the type of people now, but they can never describe the personality, and I scoff at those that tell the future or whatever. I strongly believe that God controls everything, albeit He said in the bible something like, He will give the people to their hearts desires, i.e. if they believe this way and that He may just as well allow those things to happen and twist them for His purposes, but if you believe that everything is in God's control and you trust Him for whatever that may come, then so be it. And the latter I believe is the better way to go. Okay so back to my grades argument. It is important to face reality and share them to people you can confide on. At least the next time grade talks come out in the open again, you wouldn't have to divert the topic or avoid the people and even do the most socially breaching thing in the world, WALK OUT. It is important that you know roughly the scores of others esp. in this competitive university so that you could gauge the minimum things you could do to catch up and get a passing grade. It is foolish to go about living blindly thinking everything is okay and then later you'll realize you are asked to be deported. And it is also foolish that being competitive is bad, if you think so, you're like telling the whole of Singapore that they're bad. But hey, look where is Singapore now? Isn't she endorsing competition everywhere? Check the markets, check the businesses, check everywhere and you'll see competition marked everywhere. Competition is good when you have the proper mindset about how to go about it. But don't overdo asking others, just know roughly what you need to know to start doing things.
and yeah, besides, no secrets will be kept hidden forever. When you keep them you are bound by them, if you face them and even share to the people concerned you are set free... yes, the truth will always set you free no matter how much you don't like telling them in the first place.
and about having a high score... maybe i just think differently, I am more bent on asking other people's score when I have a low grade rather than a high grade. I shut up when I think I perceive that I have a high grade because I might make others feel bad, and really, when they feel bad about themselves I feel bad in the process. Then the point of obtaining fulfillment from high grades simply erodes away just like that. I'd rather brag my low score if in the process i could cheer up low self-esteemed people.
Yey. thoughts gone out... back to my official inauguration of ivy finally trying to get back on track... HELP ME LORD! ¶ 7:01 PM 0 comments
he said something like:
when you have a low grade don't even bother asking other people's grades or else you'll feel bad. when you have a high grade you can ask people and then feel good about yourself...
I disagree... in a way you could sense self-centeredness in that claim. I'm not saying that Brice is, but the intentions can be and most likely are... Because the argument revolves around how good or bad you'd feel afterwards.
Why do I disagree? In the first place, low grades are burdens. They have to be shared to lessen their yoke on your neck. and if you think that others might belittle you, then that's simple, belittle them too if you are vengeful because they are the type of people who measures your worth to one-sided academics, and they're not really true friends at all. They are also the type who tends to go for things that would make them feel or think that they are better than others. I do not like people who thinks like that, i believe that everybody is equal in this world; one may be good in one aspect but others are better in another aspect. I take the egalitarian point of view, and which somehow gives some proof to zodiac claims... I'm a libran, a typical undecisive yet somebody who trully believes in equality, and somehow I have this strong belief that many librans share this type of view (and based on my observations as well). I'm not the astrology believer or whatever, I believe in God, but I find it interesting that zodiac signs do describe people in reality. They have a match, and I might ask Jesus about they're realness when I'll meet Him... I may tend to believe in descriptions of the type of people now, but they can never describe the personality, and I scoff at those that tell the future or whatever. I strongly believe that God controls everything, albeit He said in the bible something like, He will give the people to their hearts desires, i.e. if they believe this way and that He may just as well allow those things to happen and twist them for His purposes, but if you believe that everything is in God's control and you trust Him for whatever that may come, then so be it. And the latter I believe is the better way to go. Okay so back to my grades argument. It is important to face reality and share them to people you can confide on. At least the next time grade talks come out in the open again, you wouldn't have to divert the topic or avoid the people and even do the most socially breaching thing in the world, WALK OUT. It is important that you know roughly the scores of others esp. in this competitive university so that you could gauge the minimum things you could do to catch up and get a passing grade. It is foolish to go about living blindly thinking everything is okay and then later you'll realize you are asked to be deported. And it is also foolish that being competitive is bad, if you think so, you're like telling the whole of Singapore that they're bad. But hey, look where is Singapore now? Isn't she endorsing competition everywhere? Check the markets, check the businesses, check everywhere and you'll see competition marked everywhere. Competition is good when you have the proper mindset about how to go about it. But don't overdo asking others, just know roughly what you need to know to start doing things.
and yeah, besides, no secrets will be kept hidden forever. When you keep them you are bound by them, if you face them and even share to the people concerned you are set free... yes, the truth will always set you free no matter how much you don't like telling them in the first place.
and about having a high score... maybe i just think differently, I am more bent on asking other people's score when I have a low grade rather than a high grade. I shut up when I think I perceive that I have a high grade because I might make others feel bad, and really, when they feel bad about themselves I feel bad in the process. Then the point of obtaining fulfillment from high grades simply erodes away just like that. I'd rather brag my low score if in the process i could cheer up low self-esteemed people.
Yey. thoughts gone out... back to my official inauguration of ivy finally trying to get back on track... HELP ME LORD! ¶ 7:01 PM 0 comments
Wednesday, April 06, 2005
change?
yeah...
I think the change speaks louder than my post =)...
I'm just utilizing the convinience of readily made and available templates to suite my needs. I'm compelled to do this because I kinda get tired of my old title...
I guess when you link me, it's better to leave it as "ivy's changing world" ^_^...haha =P
okie...
i woke up late, so i failed to get my breakfast, another money wasted but this won't happen if I'm in PGP. I'm absent for my marketing class and later I will have my last lab for electrical... shoot me but i just realized i only have 2 weeks left for study and i haven't studied yet! =( argh... it's giving me more reasons to go to PGP... BTW, until now I have not accepted the KR offer. I'm still considering PGP, because in a way I'm TIRED AND SICK of being forced to do something... AND I really had enough of really bossy and in a way inconsiderate people; I really had enough of them...
reassessing myself at the moment... I may be the ultimate slacker... But I thank God for being there no matter what... and for everyone to know, what made my heart sink for the past two days (and I apologize for the forced smiles, and good if you didn't notice..because I just can't smile with a gay heart...), my mom is sick. Terrible? Think this way... You're father is long gone so you only have her left. You're 3 thousand miles away and have to wait another month before you could get back... For a month, how would you feel then? Knowing that decisions have to be made, although she decided to finally have the surgery, can you just accept the risk made? You don't have a choice... And in this helplessness the best help I could get is from God. To pray and to trust in Him. He's actually the one giving me the strength to smile . But I feel the need to trust Him more. I don't deserve His grace but because it is grace, I have it. It's easy to enjoy the world but it seems like when more important matters that really matter more albeit we most of the time take for granted, we wake up from the comfort of our dreams and face reality.
my mom is sick
i have not studied yet
i'm weak willed lately
i just don't trust God enough
i need to give-up myself more
and give-in to the world less
but I lift them up to Him...
tears will hopefully be no more, but rather I must choose to look up on Him more... So help me God...
okie... enough of that. I have to bathe and then print notes and continue the remaining things that I could continue (i didn't start the day right...)
God bless!
Carpe Diem!
-digression-
perverted doesn't necessarily mean bastos... generally perverted is something that is different, twisted, diverting from the original meaning... how could i forget that?
"wealth is futile for it can never save; and if wealth takes away what is pure and true, might as well rid of it or it may get rid of you" ¶ 10:24 AM 0 comments
I think the change speaks louder than my post =)...
I'm just utilizing the convinience of readily made and available templates to suite my needs. I'm compelled to do this because I kinda get tired of my old title...
I guess when you link me, it's better to leave it as "ivy's changing world" ^_^...haha =P
okie...
i woke up late, so i failed to get my breakfast, another money wasted but this won't happen if I'm in PGP. I'm absent for my marketing class and later I will have my last lab for electrical... shoot me but i just realized i only have 2 weeks left for study and i haven't studied yet! =( argh... it's giving me more reasons to go to PGP... BTW, until now I have not accepted the KR offer. I'm still considering PGP, because in a way I'm TIRED AND SICK of being forced to do something... AND I really had enough of really bossy and in a way inconsiderate people; I really had enough of them...
reassessing myself at the moment... I may be the ultimate slacker... But I thank God for being there no matter what... and for everyone to know, what made my heart sink for the past two days (and I apologize for the forced smiles, and good if you didn't notice..because I just can't smile with a gay heart...), my mom is sick. Terrible? Think this way... You're father is long gone so you only have her left. You're 3 thousand miles away and have to wait another month before you could get back... For a month, how would you feel then? Knowing that decisions have to be made, although she decided to finally have the surgery, can you just accept the risk made? You don't have a choice... And in this helplessness the best help I could get is from God. To pray and to trust in Him. He's actually the one giving me the strength to smile . But I feel the need to trust Him more. I don't deserve His grace but because it is grace, I have it. It's easy to enjoy the world but it seems like when more important matters that really matter more albeit we most of the time take for granted, we wake up from the comfort of our dreams and face reality.
my mom is sick
i have not studied yet
i'm weak willed lately
i just don't trust God enough
i need to give-up myself more
and give-in to the world less
but I lift them up to Him...
tears will hopefully be no more, but rather I must choose to look up on Him more... So help me God...
okie... enough of that. I have to bathe and then print notes and continue the remaining things that I could continue (i didn't start the day right...)
God bless!
Carpe Diem!
-digression-
perverted doesn't necessarily mean bastos... generally perverted is something that is different, twisted, diverting from the original meaning... how could i forget that?
"wealth is futile for it can never save; and if wealth takes away what is pure and true, might as well rid of it or it may get rid of you" ¶ 10:24 AM 0 comments
Monday, April 04, 2005
Pope John Paul II
everybody's blogging about him...
hehe, i guess i'm going with the bandwagon...
just a short message...
I don't think we ought to be sad for him... In fact, we should be happy because finally he is returning home like what Kor said in her blog... Somehow, mourning for him is not what Solomon would do, but rather Solomon would mourn for himself because he still lives in this world (in case he is still alive today...hehe). Besides, for Christians, death is not the end of everything. Death is birth, and we all will have an appointment with it.
Prayers will do, but I guess we should pray more for the living not the dead. They already left this world of testing, so what we should really be concerned of are the ones who are still alive taking the "tests". I guess the Pope also doesn't want the world to be sad for him, death is a fact of life and I believe the Pope perfectly knows it's not his end.
To me, it seems like he did a good job as a Pope. Hopefully, the people would pray more about the deserving replacement.... ¶ 6:47 PM 0 comments
hehe, i guess i'm going with the bandwagon...
just a short message...
I don't think we ought to be sad for him... In fact, we should be happy because finally he is returning home like what Kor said in her blog... Somehow, mourning for him is not what Solomon would do, but rather Solomon would mourn for himself because he still lives in this world (in case he is still alive today...hehe). Besides, for Christians, death is not the end of everything. Death is birth, and we all will have an appointment with it.
Prayers will do, but I guess we should pray more for the living not the dead. They already left this world of testing, so what we should really be concerned of are the ones who are still alive taking the "tests". I guess the Pope also doesn't want the world to be sad for him, death is a fact of life and I believe the Pope perfectly knows it's not his end.
To me, it seems like he did a good job as a Pope. Hopefully, the people would pray more about the deserving replacement.... ¶ 6:47 PM 0 comments
Sunday, April 03, 2005
happy birthday Charlene!
happy happy birthday to my childhood bestfriend! Charlene!
hehe... i'm not sure if she's able to read my blog coz I have changed blogs and addresses gazillions of times already. I'm not sure if she's able to keep track; she's also busy with her studies like me... Hehe...
Neways, I thank God for her and I'm super blessed to have her... She's one of the very loyal and real friends I got... and I treasure her my whole life.
She's trully my dear friend forever for life... =) hehe... we've been friends before birth and hopefully after death ^_^. She has witnessed the very imperfect me, and yet she's been there even when I was the most unreasonable person in the world. We shared secrets. I'm comfortable with her and I really don't worry about how horrendous I might become in her sight for I'm confident that she accepts me for who I am. Well, we're quite opposite in some ways as we've aged. She's maarte, I'm not. She's poised, well, I was; but geez everything got eroded when I became older and pressed with more pressures in life; she kept hers ^_^... Seems like the necessity of acting like Maria Clara has gone out of me...haha... She's not really sporty, but she used to be my Chinese garter playmate, and we've been to campings several times already.. And camping meant more activities... eheh, so in a way other than spors activities, we've been together with the fun stuff... Well, she looks like a snob, err... like me too somehow, but she's really pretty... As in pretty face, pretty character; what are you looking for? She also knows how to dress herself and look lovely. But anyhow, she's lovely as she is. And she got this relatively big mole on her chin; it's one of the makes-you-pretty factors actually...I forgot the common term for it...haha... nevermind... Okie, anyhow, she got a new boyfriend ^_^, and thank goodness her parents know about him... haha... I just heard the voice, he sounds like some good guy. Anyway, if he does bad to her, argh... He will see who he's actually messing up with...hahahaha.
i'm actually laughing at myself... apparently, she's the second girl friend who got a new boyfriend! ahahaha... my younger sister even had her own...although ngayon marami pa rin ang nanliligaw, i kinda told her to choose properly and make sure that she doesn't lose out on her studies, or else. I hate watching love ones getting hurt, I feel horridly sad about it... okie let's face it, i don't have one yet, some people can't even believe me when I say this, and "bo chap" (oops i'm not sure if i got the ryt frolic)...meaning I don't care. As in I don't give a damn. God knows why and I guess Korinna too, if she can still remember. hehe. But sometimes its just the hormones, and it takes time and experience, I guess, to repress them. Geez, i can't say I'm an expert, but i guess i can safely say that I can manage in God's help. It's just a matter on what you want to focus on and what your priorities are... haha... and I guess it shouldn't be too hard for a former man-hater ya? ^_^
Oh well, stop me.
I better start my essay...
God bless!
P.S.
NIGHT CYCLING IS THE COOLEST THING I'VE EVER DONE WITH A BLOCK SO FAR ^_^ ¶ 9:40 PM 1 comments
hehe... i'm not sure if she's able to read my blog coz I have changed blogs and addresses gazillions of times already. I'm not sure if she's able to keep track; she's also busy with her studies like me... Hehe...
Neways, I thank God for her and I'm super blessed to have her... She's one of the very loyal and real friends I got... and I treasure her my whole life.
She's trully my dear friend forever for life... =) hehe... we've been friends before birth and hopefully after death ^_^. She has witnessed the very imperfect me, and yet she's been there even when I was the most unreasonable person in the world. We shared secrets. I'm comfortable with her and I really don't worry about how horrendous I might become in her sight for I'm confident that she accepts me for who I am. Well, we're quite opposite in some ways as we've aged. She's maarte, I'm not. She's poised, well, I was; but geez everything got eroded when I became older and pressed with more pressures in life; she kept hers ^_^... Seems like the necessity of acting like Maria Clara has gone out of me...haha... She's not really sporty, but she used to be my Chinese garter playmate, and we've been to campings several times already.. And camping meant more activities... eheh, so in a way other than spors activities, we've been together with the fun stuff... Well, she looks like a snob, err... like me too somehow, but she's really pretty... As in pretty face, pretty character; what are you looking for? She also knows how to dress herself and look lovely. But anyhow, she's lovely as she is. And she got this relatively big mole on her chin; it's one of the makes-you-pretty factors actually...I forgot the common term for it...haha... nevermind... Okie, anyhow, she got a new boyfriend ^_^, and thank goodness her parents know about him... haha... I just heard the voice, he sounds like some good guy. Anyway, if he does bad to her, argh... He will see who he's actually messing up with...hahahaha.
i'm actually laughing at myself... apparently, she's the second girl friend who got a new boyfriend! ahahaha... my younger sister even had her own...although ngayon marami pa rin ang nanliligaw, i kinda told her to choose properly and make sure that she doesn't lose out on her studies, or else. I hate watching love ones getting hurt, I feel horridly sad about it... okie let's face it, i don't have one yet, some people can't even believe me when I say this, and "bo chap" (oops i'm not sure if i got the ryt frolic)...meaning I don't care. As in I don't give a damn. God knows why and I guess Korinna too, if she can still remember. hehe. But sometimes its just the hormones, and it takes time and experience, I guess, to repress them. Geez, i can't say I'm an expert, but i guess i can safely say that I can manage in God's help. It's just a matter on what you want to focus on and what your priorities are... haha... and I guess it shouldn't be too hard for a former man-hater ya? ^_^
Oh well, stop me.
I better start my essay...
God bless!
P.S.
NIGHT CYCLING IS THE COOLEST THING I'VE EVER DONE WITH A BLOCK SO FAR ^_^ ¶ 9:40 PM 1 comments
Saturday, April 02, 2005
ikes
one of my wisdom-teeth-to-be is growing!
i'm starting to feel the pain!
I'm getting old!
hehe ¶ 3:52 PM 0 comments
i'm starting to feel the pain!
I'm getting old!
hehe ¶ 3:52 PM 0 comments
ikes
one of my wisdom teeth to be is growing... i'm starting to feel the pain...hehehe...
i'm really getting older! ¶ 3:50 PM 0 comments
i'm really getting older! ¶ 3:50 PM 0 comments
april =)
i was happy and now i'm...err...
neways! i'm wishing everybody a wonderful exam month!
make sure we don't go insane ya? better an average mark than drive yaself nuts... people love ya not for yer grades but for who you really are =).
on the positive side... all these challenges will come to pass... Hold on to Him!
besides, He'll never test us beyond our strength... and if we have fallen to temptation, He'll provide a way out because He knows our incapabilities. And all these things happen just to teach us how to trust Him more, and to just let Him do His work in us. =) ¶ 5:28 AM 0 comments
neways! i'm wishing everybody a wonderful exam month!
make sure we don't go insane ya? better an average mark than drive yaself nuts... people love ya not for yer grades but for who you really are =).
on the positive side... all these challenges will come to pass... Hold on to Him!
besides, He'll never test us beyond our strength... and if we have fallen to temptation, He'll provide a way out because He knows our incapabilities. And all these things happen just to teach us how to trust Him more, and to just let Him do His work in us. =) ¶ 5:28 AM 0 comments
Friday, April 01, 2005
confessions
i typically have two things to share, or to be safe a few things to share...
"i shouldn't be blogging but..."--> yeah right... i was supposed to start this entry with that again... makes me wonder how many times have i done it...hehe and all the more my blogging friends who experience the same university pressure with me. Oh well, so back to my stuff...
1.I can still remember that I've mentioned here that i currently have a horrible appetite, i eat almost anything edible I could get my hands on. I guess i found some obvious effective solution for it, hopefully... Jog... hehe... I think i got an apple shaped body, so jogging is good to size down the legs and temporarily remove cravings. For pear shaped, those who tend to have great slender legs, and usually its the tummy that gets big, jogging is good because according to what i've read somewhere in the internet, leg exercises are the best way to trim down those belly fats. And yeah, exercise removes food cravings! Moreover, it could build your endurance. Jogging anyone?--> hehe... ryt! exams are coming!
2. I admit I don't study... and I hate the way I'm being pressured to study... I want to study at my own pace. I know I'm a bit slow, but if there's a will there's a way. So what if everybody studies loooong hours? I just observed that even those who study long hours don't get marks as good as those who study smartly. These people are the ones who perfectly understands that longevity in study periods cannot determine your academic success but rather it's the YOU-UNDERSTANDING-THE-CONCEPTS-AND-ONCE-YOU-GET-IT-DON'T-HAVE-TO-LINGER-ON-IT-MUCH-LONGER-JUST-BECAUSE-EVERYBODY-IS-DOING-IT type, else you'll only end up fatiguing your nerves ~~ mental block anyone?(based on experience yes.. i got fatigued nerves or however they call it because I thought that if i studied as long as most typical uni people do, i could get good or even better marks) BUT THE BIG BIG PROB IS HOW TO STUDY SMARTLY? Ivy, can't you just judge accordingly?
3. OKAY... NOW THIS ONE IS HUGELY SHALLOW... just like this world... FRIENDSTER OBSERVATION! yes, i visit my friendster account every now and then, and did some entertaining stuff with it, i.e. asking my ex-crush to be my friend, and the rest... And with regards to this observation that I'm going to talk about, it hugely speaks about how people are magnetized to good looks rather than interest on knowing the person trully... Neways, it's typical and its common that most people wants to be accepted by good looking people.. and apologies to the shorties, height is also a good looking asset according to some research that I've read in the net (*bahgz*-->hit me hard! =P )... But anyway, it's the looks that count especially when you look at strangers.. Isn't it noticable that pretty people gets much of the attention? BUT THAT'S THE WORLD AND THAT'S THE BANDWAGON, okay?... there are positive and negative arguments about this; but anyway, my stand? Don't judge with the world, just because everybody is doing it doesn't mean that they're right! It's not wrong to be attracted to good looks, but it's wrong to be judgemental to those who don't have them physically. Don't let prejudice make you ugly! Follow Jesus, He doesn't judge people on their looks but on their hearts. Okay back again to my observation, what was it? well, it's just the display picture. End of Feb, got around 60 or maybe 70 views since i think the 15th of Feb or something late feb(yeah i know they're probably few compared to you but lets speak relatively here ya?). so weekly, around 25-35 views... then on the first 2 weeks of march or 1.5 or maybe less or more, i changed my display pix from a presentable looking pix of myself to cartoon characters (as how my marketing prof would call them) and less presentable pix taken when i looked fairly normal... and there was a drastic change to the number of views! it was pulled down to some less than 10 and not even changing as days passed, averaging to less than 10 views per week and compare that to 25-35 views, it's like 3 times less! Then later i had this more presentable looking pix; I changed my display pix with it, and guess what? after a few days or two the views rose up to 30, and then to 50 plus! ... I myt be exaggerating on the significance of my topic, but I was somehow a little dismayed to take note of this... so I'm sharing it here... neways, friendster anyone?
I shouldn't be blogging but...
sigh... its late 3 am! haha...coffee anyone?
God bless you!
oh yeah..." the fear of the Lord is the beginning of all wisdom" ¶ 3:05 AM 0 comments
"i shouldn't be blogging but..."--> yeah right... i was supposed to start this entry with that again... makes me wonder how many times have i done it...hehe and all the more my blogging friends who experience the same university pressure with me. Oh well, so back to my stuff...
1.I can still remember that I've mentioned here that i currently have a horrible appetite, i eat almost anything edible I could get my hands on. I guess i found some obvious effective solution for it, hopefully... Jog... hehe... I think i got an apple shaped body, so jogging is good to size down the legs and temporarily remove cravings. For pear shaped, those who tend to have great slender legs, and usually its the tummy that gets big, jogging is good because according to what i've read somewhere in the internet, leg exercises are the best way to trim down those belly fats. And yeah, exercise removes food cravings! Moreover, it could build your endurance. Jogging anyone?--> hehe... ryt! exams are coming!
2. I admit I don't study... and I hate the way I'm being pressured to study... I want to study at my own pace. I know I'm a bit slow, but if there's a will there's a way. So what if everybody studies loooong hours? I just observed that even those who study long hours don't get marks as good as those who study smartly. These people are the ones who perfectly understands that longevity in study periods cannot determine your academic success but rather it's the YOU-UNDERSTANDING-THE-CONCEPTS-AND-ONCE-YOU-GET-IT-DON'T-HAVE-TO-LINGER-ON-IT-MUCH-LONGER-JUST-BECAUSE-EVERYBODY-IS-DOING-IT type, else you'll only end up fatiguing your nerves ~~ mental block anyone?(based on experience yes.. i got fatigued nerves or however they call it because I thought that if i studied as long as most typical uni people do, i could get good or even better marks) BUT THE BIG BIG PROB IS HOW TO STUDY SMARTLY? Ivy, can't you just judge accordingly?
3. OKAY... NOW THIS ONE IS HUGELY SHALLOW... just like this world... FRIENDSTER OBSERVATION! yes, i visit my friendster account every now and then, and did some entertaining stuff with it, i.e. asking my ex-crush to be my friend, and the rest... And with regards to this observation that I'm going to talk about, it hugely speaks about how people are magnetized to good looks rather than interest on knowing the person trully... Neways, it's typical and its common that most people wants to be accepted by good looking people.. and apologies to the shorties, height is also a good looking asset according to some research that I've read in the net (*bahgz*-->hit me hard! =P )... But anyway, it's the looks that count especially when you look at strangers.. Isn't it noticable that pretty people gets much of the attention? BUT THAT'S THE WORLD AND THAT'S THE BANDWAGON, okay?... there are positive and negative arguments about this; but anyway, my stand? Don't judge with the world, just because everybody is doing it doesn't mean that they're right! It's not wrong to be attracted to good looks, but it's wrong to be judgemental to those who don't have them physically. Don't let prejudice make you ugly! Follow Jesus, He doesn't judge people on their looks but on their hearts. Okay back again to my observation, what was it? well, it's just the display picture. End of Feb, got around 60 or maybe 70 views since i think the 15th of Feb or something late feb(yeah i know they're probably few compared to you but lets speak relatively here ya?). so weekly, around 25-35 views... then on the first 2 weeks of march or 1.5 or maybe less or more, i changed my display pix from a presentable looking pix of myself to cartoon characters (as how my marketing prof would call them) and less presentable pix taken when i looked fairly normal... and there was a drastic change to the number of views! it was pulled down to some less than 10 and not even changing as days passed, averaging to less than 10 views per week and compare that to 25-35 views, it's like 3 times less! Then later i had this more presentable looking pix; I changed my display pix with it, and guess what? after a few days or two the views rose up to 30, and then to 50 plus! ... I myt be exaggerating on the significance of my topic, but I was somehow a little dismayed to take note of this... so I'm sharing it here... neways, friendster anyone?
I shouldn't be blogging but...
sigh... its late 3 am! haha...coffee anyone?
God bless you!
oh yeah..." the fear of the Lord is the beginning of all wisdom" ¶ 3:05 AM 0 comments
