tEa TiMe!!!
Sunday, February 27, 2005
amazing surprises comes in small packages
I just want to appreciate my birthmate for writing me a testimonial (in friendster). It was unexpected and indeed it came to me as a "sweet" surprise. I mean i know testimonials aren't really big stuff, but hey, after having quite a busy week and getting stuck in your room missing out the joys you could have otherwise enjoyed in the price of your grades, unexpected things from people can be just as good as relaxation...
What was striking in the testimonial is that this birthmate made me ponder again about things i like pondering about... Changes... yep... Funny how time could change people... All the while you are not with them, people are changing, and the next time you see them again you'd be surprised at how much they have grown and changed... I wouldn't be surprised if I'd get surprised when I see my friends again. =) Cool surprises =). I also got a surprise of my own i think... Maybe when my mom sees me again after 9 long months, she'd notice a change; and hopefully, for the better... =)
Interesting to note that God have been working out things, allowing this and that and still get to bend things that they may happen according to His plans. Amazing how young teenagers grow and change, and how God makes Himself known to them all along... Yes, those we're the younger days when all the while we thought we've grown enough but frankly we're just little kids wandering about. Thinking... Thinking that we could do things on our own and then series of events happen, shattering the principles we tried to live on with... Quite complicated events continue to proceed and then we never really realize what actually happened along the way; we just find ourselves standing for the Lord (this is for the case of Christian teens like me) and growing up again from infanthood...
... here i am again... hehe from just an appreciation of a testimonial to some reflections... oh well...
God bless! ¶ 6:53 PM 0 comments
What was striking in the testimonial is that this birthmate made me ponder again about things i like pondering about... Changes... yep... Funny how time could change people... All the while you are not with them, people are changing, and the next time you see them again you'd be surprised at how much they have grown and changed... I wouldn't be surprised if I'd get surprised when I see my friends again. =) Cool surprises =). I also got a surprise of my own i think... Maybe when my mom sees me again after 9 long months, she'd notice a change; and hopefully, for the better... =)
Interesting to note that God have been working out things, allowing this and that and still get to bend things that they may happen according to His plans. Amazing how young teenagers grow and change, and how God makes Himself known to them all along... Yes, those we're the younger days when all the while we thought we've grown enough but frankly we're just little kids wandering about. Thinking... Thinking that we could do things on our own and then series of events happen, shattering the principles we tried to live on with... Quite complicated events continue to proceed and then we never really realize what actually happened along the way; we just find ourselves standing for the Lord (this is for the case of Christian teens like me) and growing up again from infanthood...
... here i am again... hehe from just an appreciation of a testimonial to some reflections... oh well...
God bless! ¶ 6:53 PM 0 comments
Friday, February 25, 2005
IT IS DISCOURAGED TO READ BOOKS LIKE THE "DA VINCI'S CODE"
Silly of me to believe whoever told me that reading books with opposing ideas against what i trully believe in as real (the Bible) is only a matter of how you handle the "outrageous" ideas yourself. You can always have an option to believe in on what you want to believe in. So as for Christians, the Da Vinci's Code and the like can be read but the person must be strong enough that they are not dissuaded. Just take the ideas there as mere ideas and nothing more but ideas...--> this is a wrong concept... ideas as such are like viruses, they may seem harmless/lifeless from afar but once they get the touch of you, they spread and thrive on you like sunlight greets the land. They can be inevitable and you may never realize it until they get the life out of you...
IT WAS ALSO A BIG MISTAKE TO SPREAD SUCH NOTION. In the first place how would you know that a person is strong enough in the Word of God and knows how to juggle its truth against what books like the example i mentioned say? Who knows how strong the "Da Vinci's Code" ideas are? I think it may depend on the type of person, but surely the book's influence can be adversely great. Well, for example I just realized that many Christians have made it their favorite book, for some, they followed its principles and more or less believed that they are real, others may have stopped believing in the Bible while others have deceased in serving the Lord [*i know some people*]... Just as it is implied in the Bible.... (later i shall disclose the verse that struck me).
%$@^$@%&!!! Sorry Dan Brown and company, I believe you'd be more sorry for writing the book...
Jesus new you're coming and He talked about people like you in Luke 17:1-3, there He said:
"Things that cause people to sin are bound to come, but woe to that person through whom they come. It would be better for Him to be thrown in the sea with a millstone tied around his neck than for him to cause one of these little ones to sin. So watch yourselves."
and there... I have sinned... For believing that somebody's idea: "reading the Da Vinci's Code was okay as long as you can handle it" and spreading such idea to those who ask about it. I didn't know and I was unaware until I came over those verses and finally realized their over-all essential meaning ... Forgive me for spreading so. To those whom I have told this: It is up to you now, and my prayers shall be with you. I hope you can handle it, and keep handling the ideas until He comes. Hide them in a box, lock them hard; if possible, burn them, then throw them to the sea. How i wish that you could totally irradicate them like you've never read them at all. Now that you have already read them, and there's nothing i can do to change such a fact, you will have this tendency of abiding to the ideas no matter how strong you are in the Word of God. You are only human and humans are hugely vulnerable. Satan fairly knows his expertise. Please, be on guard.
It may be God's plan for me to believe the fallacious notion about reading books with heretical ideas (with respect to the Word) and to share it to other people,(for it is also said that they are bound to come) but I think it is important to make an errata about it (also part of what He may want to happen)... And this post is the errata! ^_^ Read my conclusion way down below...
So, what passage caused me to write all these? The Lord revealed me this:
1Timothy 6:20-21
"Timothy [us], guard what has been entrusted to your care. Turn away from godless chatter and the opposing ideas of what is falsely called as knowledge [*ting! does this ring a bell to you? yep, the "Da Vinci's Code" is one perfect example*] which some have professed and in doing so have wandered from the faith [*like the ellaboration i gave in paragraph 2*]...."
CONCLUSION:
-> Don't always believe what people say regarding essential topics like this. Confirm and conform it in the Lord's Word. If you cannot find it, don't do it (i.e. read) until you find an answer about it. Pray and ask even your Pastor or those who are well versed in the Bible about it. So you will not be led astray by misguided decisions...
-> Don't read books that may give you opposing ideas to your faith. They may be appealing for they are recommended by many people and they may even give you the idea that they'd make you more knowledgeable, but you'll never know how great the effects on you will be (even after reading... The effects may show sometime in your life, just waiting for some stimulus.). Be on guard, Satan does not sleep and He makes good attacks when you are complacent.
-> We are only human. It is wiser to prevent. Stay away from which you are vulnerable to avert you from the faith...
P.S. God and even friends know how many times i've tried to get myself a copy of the Da Vinci's Code to read... and it has been like nearly 2 years of search and waiting... I just realized that it was God's grace all along that prevented me from reading the book... Yes, it could be possible that the book's effect on me would be direly and adversely big that's why it never really came to my hands... ¶ 9:54 AM 2 comments
IT WAS ALSO A BIG MISTAKE TO SPREAD SUCH NOTION. In the first place how would you know that a person is strong enough in the Word of God and knows how to juggle its truth against what books like the example i mentioned say? Who knows how strong the "Da Vinci's Code" ideas are? I think it may depend on the type of person, but surely the book's influence can be adversely great. Well, for example I just realized that many Christians have made it their favorite book, for some, they followed its principles and more or less believed that they are real, others may have stopped believing in the Bible while others have deceased in serving the Lord [*i know some people*]... Just as it is implied in the Bible.... (later i shall disclose the verse that struck me).
%$@^$@%&!!! Sorry Dan Brown and company, I believe you'd be more sorry for writing the book...
Jesus new you're coming and He talked about people like you in Luke 17:1-3, there He said:
"Things that cause people to sin are bound to come, but woe to that person through whom they come. It would be better for Him to be thrown in the sea with a millstone tied around his neck than for him to cause one of these little ones to sin. So watch yourselves."
and there... I have sinned... For believing that somebody's idea: "reading the Da Vinci's Code was okay as long as you can handle it" and spreading such idea to those who ask about it. I didn't know and I was unaware until I came over those verses and finally realized their over-all essential meaning ... Forgive me for spreading so. To those whom I have told this: It is up to you now, and my prayers shall be with you. I hope you can handle it, and keep handling the ideas until He comes. Hide them in a box, lock them hard; if possible, burn them, then throw them to the sea. How i wish that you could totally irradicate them like you've never read them at all. Now that you have already read them, and there's nothing i can do to change such a fact, you will have this tendency of abiding to the ideas no matter how strong you are in the Word of God. You are only human and humans are hugely vulnerable. Satan fairly knows his expertise. Please, be on guard.
It may be God's plan for me to believe the fallacious notion about reading books with heretical ideas (with respect to the Word) and to share it to other people,(for it is also said that they are bound to come) but I think it is important to make an errata about it (also part of what He may want to happen)... And this post is the errata! ^_^ Read my conclusion way down below...
So, what passage caused me to write all these? The Lord revealed me this:
1Timothy 6:20-21
"Timothy [us], guard what has been entrusted to your care. Turn away from godless chatter and the opposing ideas of what is falsely called as knowledge [*ting! does this ring a bell to you? yep, the "Da Vinci's Code" is one perfect example*] which some have professed and in doing so have wandered from the faith [*like the ellaboration i gave in paragraph 2*]...."
CONCLUSION:
-> Don't always believe what people say regarding essential topics like this. Confirm and conform it in the Lord's Word. If you cannot find it, don't do it (i.e. read) until you find an answer about it. Pray and ask even your Pastor or those who are well versed in the Bible about it. So you will not be led astray by misguided decisions...
-> Don't read books that may give you opposing ideas to your faith. They may be appealing for they are recommended by many people and they may even give you the idea that they'd make you more knowledgeable, but you'll never know how great the effects on you will be (even after reading... The effects may show sometime in your life, just waiting for some stimulus.). Be on guard, Satan does not sleep and He makes good attacks when you are complacent.
-> We are only human. It is wiser to prevent. Stay away from which you are vulnerable to avert you from the faith...
P.S. God and even friends know how many times i've tried to get myself a copy of the Da Vinci's Code to read... and it has been like nearly 2 years of search and waiting... I just realized that it was God's grace all along that prevented me from reading the book... Yes, it could be possible that the book's effect on me would be direly and adversely big that's why it never really came to my hands... ¶ 9:54 AM 2 comments
i daresay, "those we're the good old days!"
my secret identity
hehe... UCC backstage =)...
...hi skul...
first few months sa youth...
hehe... la lang... quite a long time have passed! nearly 2 years in Spore! and nearly one year away from home! waaa!...
geez... i'm really growing old...
latest crazy pix:
nakatagilid! hahaa... ako medjo naduling dito ah!
cge pa tilt your head para nakatayo na sila sa iyong paningin ^_^ ¶ 12:01 AM 0 comments
my secret identity
hehe... UCC backstage =)...
...hi skul...
first few months sa youth...
hehe... la lang... quite a long time have passed! nearly 2 years in Spore! and nearly one year away from home! waaa!...
geez... i'm really growing old...
latest crazy pix:
nakatagilid! hahaa... ako medjo naduling dito ah!
cge pa tilt your head para nakatayo na sila sa iyong paningin ^_^ ¶ 12:01 AM 0 comments
Tuesday, February 22, 2005
but then again and again
So, what if i'm lame, and dumb and fat at the same time?
Such characteristics can never change my real worth in the Lord =). A pluses could never add a single hour to my life, rather, enjoying the Lord could add life in every hour with Him. I may agree that death is the great equalizer among all men, highly intellectual or not, drop-dead gorgeous or not, filthy rich or not... But the thing that sets me, and the rest of the believers, apart from the rest of the world is the way we spend life here before meeting the midwife (death) and how we will meet her as well... Nope, we aren't scared of death; for everything is planned out, when it's time for us to die, we die. And death is sweet, for after that, we are a step closer to meeting Him finally! =)
The only thing i'll never want to happen is astraying again... I don't want to experience the Lord's wrath, I'd rather not exist...
I don't care what the world says.. I don't care if they say i look fat or i look ugly or i am dumb, for they don't know the me that's really me. Jesus does. The world sees me as some physical entity and judges me just like the rest of the world. But i don't care, they don't know how to judge, neither do they have the right to determine my worth. They too are judged.
Why let the world tell you who you are, when they themselves don't trully know who they really are. They keep on pointing fingers and they never look at the mirror. They keep on setting standards but they themselves have no firm basis. They let themselves be deceived while deceiving others, and they tend to be short-sighted. They don't see what's beyond, all they see is what their eyes can see and what they want to see. What's with the world? Purely worthless emptiness...
I'm still stuck in the world, but i will not act like them as long as my consciousness could tell so. Yes, in the Spirit's guidance, I won't...
and yeah... the steamboat was good! i ate at my delight, and at the same time tasting how good the Lord is! there were two unbelievers there and it's interesting to witness how people who doesn't know Christ tend to question, and how would God prompt them to do so. It's innate, like it has always been there since the beginning and now it's all coming out. Moreover, it's wonderful how the saints answer them based on the Word, and as well as realizing how much answers an unbelieving heart would want to seek when it's all just there, waiting to be told. I know in time I could help out seeking people like them. In the Lord's time, I can help out the missing children of the Lord. =)
yes all these things will pass away, but the Word of God will never pass away...
it is also not the seen things that are essential but rather the unseen...
the seen seems to come from the unseen, for the unseen existed first before the seen came to life... ¶ 10:19 PM 0 comments
Such characteristics can never change my real worth in the Lord =). A pluses could never add a single hour to my life, rather, enjoying the Lord could add life in every hour with Him. I may agree that death is the great equalizer among all men, highly intellectual or not, drop-dead gorgeous or not, filthy rich or not... But the thing that sets me, and the rest of the believers, apart from the rest of the world is the way we spend life here before meeting the midwife (death) and how we will meet her as well... Nope, we aren't scared of death; for everything is planned out, when it's time for us to die, we die. And death is sweet, for after that, we are a step closer to meeting Him finally! =)
The only thing i'll never want to happen is astraying again... I don't want to experience the Lord's wrath, I'd rather not exist...
I don't care what the world says.. I don't care if they say i look fat or i look ugly or i am dumb, for they don't know the me that's really me. Jesus does. The world sees me as some physical entity and judges me just like the rest of the world. But i don't care, they don't know how to judge, neither do they have the right to determine my worth. They too are judged.
Why let the world tell you who you are, when they themselves don't trully know who they really are. They keep on pointing fingers and they never look at the mirror. They keep on setting standards but they themselves have no firm basis. They let themselves be deceived while deceiving others, and they tend to be short-sighted. They don't see what's beyond, all they see is what their eyes can see and what they want to see. What's with the world? Purely worthless emptiness...
I'm still stuck in the world, but i will not act like them as long as my consciousness could tell so. Yes, in the Spirit's guidance, I won't...
and yeah... the steamboat was good! i ate at my delight, and at the same time tasting how good the Lord is! there were two unbelievers there and it's interesting to witness how people who doesn't know Christ tend to question, and how would God prompt them to do so. It's innate, like it has always been there since the beginning and now it's all coming out. Moreover, it's wonderful how the saints answer them based on the Word, and as well as realizing how much answers an unbelieving heart would want to seek when it's all just there, waiting to be told. I know in time I could help out seeking people like them. In the Lord's time, I can help out the missing children of the Lord. =)
yes all these things will pass away, but the Word of God will never pass away...
it is also not the seen things that are essential but rather the unseen...
the seen seems to come from the unseen, for the unseen existed first before the seen came to life... ¶ 10:19 PM 0 comments
day of indulegence:FOOD STUFF
my one greatest weakness: FOOD!
nope i'm not one of those who loves to eat!
I'm one of those who got PASSION for EATING A LOT!
I LOVE FOOD! and now it's like an obsession!
i just ate a whole snack pack of oreo (9 servings per pack), and geez, i love peanut butter! well they say it's filled with good fat and 2 tablespoons of it each day, according to many many researchers, would save you from heart diseases, apparently, for me, 6-8 tablespoons of peanut butter a day is yummy! hey? aren't those numbers similar with daily water intake?
and not only that! i guess i need a loaf bread a day to pair up with those peanut servings! one slice one tablespoon... stop! 6-8 tablespoons is an underestimation! How many slices are there in a loaf bread? 20? uhm... okie... let's just say i need half a loaf bread, that reduces to a more realistic serving of 8-10 tablespoons a day and roughly 2 520-gram peanut butter a week... roughly 10 dollars for peanut butter alone... hehehe...
calorie-wise, uhm i think my intake was like 140*9 (oreo) + 125*5 (bread) + 141*5 (peanut butter) + 50 (fruit) + 100 (blueberry bread) + 100 (meat) + 80 (mashed potato) = 2920! a whooping 3K calories ( roughly 12000 joules!) just for roughly 2 meals! waaaah! is that enough to fly a rocket? hehehe... and later, i'll estimate around 1000 calories more for steamboat dinner... so for the record i ate 2 days meal in just a day! that is excluded calories from fat =P...
why do i brag about it? because i will never buy another peanut butter jar and store it in my room again! ever! as in never ever! it's the open door to greater temptation!!! but i guess i'll always love peanut butter... i just have to avoid it because i cannot do portion control ... Moreover, i love nuts! all forms except probably walnuts... I love cashew nuts! I like almonds! macadamia nuts rock! coconut? you bet! peanuts and the rest? of course!
haha... okie... i better avoid nuts... or i'll be x2 again ( i think the world already knows that i've gone overweight last last sem (according to calculations and the feelings i felt)--> in KE; although well it was somehow a "dare" coming true because i've always wanted to know how it feels like to be fat; i was born skinny (if u have seen my primary school pics, they even name-call me as princess of goats) and i've tried for many years to be fat (hi skul [-> i think i destroyed my fast metabolism those days, i had a nearly slouchy lifestyle although it was still good compared to now] to erm... last year), and finally it did came to reality when i came here in singapore)... I should let my mom do my grocery coz back home i'm not like this...sigh... ^_^
fat? yeah.. it feels awful, and im lazy 80% of the time; lame , i hate to be lame as in! (if there is one thing i never want to incorporate my existence with, it is being LAME!). ALSO, your clothes don't fit and for those that do, they are body-fit. you don't have to use a belt, and you even feel ugly because your jeans surface those protrusions that aren't supposed to be there. my legs are wider, fortunately, my tummy roughly stayed at 25-26, because i have this body type where most fats get stored on my legs. but then, i have more than enough fat to think! hehe... no wonder it was the sem when i finally got some kinda like As... hmmm... trade-off! since last sem, im less fat but my grades were uhm... argh... this sem i'm becoming fat again, so... walau! (josh pahiram) heheheh... ano ba to? ang labo ko! ang labo din ng logic... hahahaha ^_^... basta yan na yan... i don't know... I DON'T WANT TO BE LAME BUT I ALSO DON'T WANT TO BE DUMB IN CLASS... yikes... being fat and smart got good positive correlation ya know (for me)...
tama na! back to ... uhm... uh oh! steamboat time na pala!
last na talaga to!
I CAN FEEL IT NOW! hehe
ciao! ¶ 5:22 PM 0 comments
nope i'm not one of those who loves to eat!
I'm one of those who got PASSION for EATING A LOT!
I LOVE FOOD! and now it's like an obsession!
i just ate a whole snack pack of oreo (9 servings per pack), and geez, i love peanut butter! well they say it's filled with good fat and 2 tablespoons of it each day, according to many many researchers, would save you from heart diseases, apparently, for me, 6-8 tablespoons of peanut butter a day is yummy! hey? aren't those numbers similar with daily water intake?
and not only that! i guess i need a loaf bread a day to pair up with those peanut servings! one slice one tablespoon... stop! 6-8 tablespoons is an underestimation! How many slices are there in a loaf bread? 20? uhm... okie... let's just say i need half a loaf bread, that reduces to a more realistic serving of 8-10 tablespoons a day and roughly 2 520-gram peanut butter a week... roughly 10 dollars for peanut butter alone... hehehe...
calorie-wise, uhm i think my intake was like 140*9 (oreo) + 125*5 (bread) + 141*5 (peanut butter) + 50 (fruit) + 100 (blueberry bread) + 100 (meat) + 80 (mashed potato) = 2920! a whooping 3K calories ( roughly 12000 joules!) just for roughly 2 meals! waaaah! is that enough to fly a rocket? hehehe... and later, i'll estimate around 1000 calories more for steamboat dinner... so for the record i ate 2 days meal in just a day! that is excluded calories from fat =P...
why do i brag about it? because i will never buy another peanut butter jar and store it in my room again! ever! as in never ever! it's the open door to greater temptation!!! but i guess i'll always love peanut butter... i just have to avoid it because i cannot do portion control ... Moreover, i love nuts! all forms except probably walnuts... I love cashew nuts! I like almonds! macadamia nuts rock! coconut? you bet! peanuts and the rest? of course!
haha... okie... i better avoid nuts... or i'll be x2 again ( i think the world already knows that i've gone overweight last last sem (according to calculations and the feelings i felt)--> in KE; although well it was somehow a "dare" coming true because i've always wanted to know how it feels like to be fat; i was born skinny (if u have seen my primary school pics, they even name-call me as princess of goats) and i've tried for many years to be fat (hi skul [-> i think i destroyed my fast metabolism those days, i had a nearly slouchy lifestyle although it was still good compared to now] to erm... last year), and finally it did came to reality when i came here in singapore)... I should let my mom do my grocery coz back home i'm not like this...sigh... ^_^
fat? yeah.. it feels awful, and im lazy 80% of the time; lame , i hate to be lame as in! (if there is one thing i never want to incorporate my existence with, it is being LAME!). ALSO, your clothes don't fit and for those that do, they are body-fit. you don't have to use a belt, and you even feel ugly because your jeans surface those protrusions that aren't supposed to be there. my legs are wider, fortunately, my tummy roughly stayed at 25-26, because i have this body type where most fats get stored on my legs. but then, i have more than enough fat to think! hehe... no wonder it was the sem when i finally got some kinda like As... hmmm... trade-off! since last sem, im less fat but my grades were uhm... argh... this sem i'm becoming fat again, so... walau! (josh pahiram) heheheh... ano ba to? ang labo ko! ang labo din ng logic... hahahaha ^_^... basta yan na yan... i don't know... I DON'T WANT TO BE LAME BUT I ALSO DON'T WANT TO BE DUMB IN CLASS... yikes... being fat and smart got good positive correlation ya know (for me)...
tama na! back to ... uhm... uh oh! steamboat time na pala!
last na talaga to!
I CAN FEEL IT NOW! hehe
ciao! ¶ 5:22 PM 0 comments
Sunday, February 20, 2005
all the fun i've missed
guess what?
i missed kinda lot of fun!
seems like Kor lured someone... haha... basically the main reason why i didn't continue dancing with my partner the other night. I don't want another guy... Or well at least not even at personal level unless you were that guy that kept my eyes hooked on... hehe... clue? he's from temasek =P... oh..that clue i believe should be more than enough for those who would desperately do some investigation. I don't want to disclose his name either coz he's a local with chinese name, and chinese names ya know are hard to pronounce and worse, spell! hahaha....
Okie what really happened the other night? I believe the others, Kor and Josh, wouldn't want to tell the whole story, because the event (before the bash) basically revolved around my misfortune, thus, giving me "more right" to divulge it to the world. The major reason why i want to forget that night, not that i smelled like cigarrette practically from head to toe afterwards, but rather it didn't really went off well... First trouble, my sandal broke down after taking the taxi from 200 bus stop near pgp, that was around 8:30 i guess and the rouge program starts at 9 pm. It was like a mentos thing, one got a heel and the other got none, and apparently josh got some mentos and I grabbed a piece... Shux! it was mentos stuff when i went to the train platform, looked for a bleacher and attempted in removing the other heel. (in Josh's term pa, grace under stress...hehehe...thanks josh for terming it more nicely). Well, im not blaming tuk for stopping me in separating the sandal part properly from its heel and suggested instead a more destructable one... It's all i believe, part of God's plan, so Kor, it wasn't at all your fault, i didn't tell you on the train because i was "sad", i'm not blaming anyone at all; i was just thinking, trying to look at the brighter side of things (actually from a third party point of view, what happened to me was hilarious!)... hehe... a series of misfortunes... =)... so there, the attempt of removing the other heel was a total fiasco. There was an unheeled slipper, which i think looked cool, and a heeled one, smiling, with a strap on the loose.
Minutes later when the train headed for pasir ris came, and since we were discussing whether to go to clementi or not (i "argued" that they go ahead but they didn't want to, they want to accompany me else they'd feel bad as well... i wanted them to go ahead because i'm the type of person who really doesn't want to waste other people's time because of my "misfortune" or more like because of what happened to me... I'm one of those who loves to say "the show must go on, go without me", it was also around 8:40 and Somerset is still quite far); we rushed to the train... There silence and well, for my part, thinking. A lot of ideas came to my head, and josh suggested quite a number of good ones. But heck, ya know i'm indecisive; ideas were good , they kept coming and all the more kept me confused. The obvious wasn't at all there (for me). Tanjong Pagar Station: I groped my bag in the hope of my EZ link card, none. My pockets none; then i realized that i was holding my EZ-link while i was looking for a bleacher (remember the mentos stuff earlier?), and we rushed off to the train: that trimmed down the look-out to the bleacher... Yep, i left my EZ-link card on the bleacher, and i "feared" that it's already stolen... More bad feelings building up... More thoughts... like remembering the time when I wanted to replace my ez-link with a new one because i misplaced the old one (coz that time i definitely have no choice but to do so), and yeah.. i have to buy a pair of slippers too, but got to handle the imbalanced height and the weird looking pair of slippers im wearin. So, one station, (was it tanjong pagar? or outram? hmmm....) i rushed off to the opposite train, giving the 3 people i'm with no choice but to stay on the train (hehe...ooops... coz trust me, i want them badly to go ahead). And thanks to Tuk for keeping the heel of my unheeled slipper on her bag =).
So there I was... Alone... Nah! I wasn't... I was asking Him what and/or why. I was calm... although when karen called for josh on my way back to bouna vista, i was distressed... can barely control though, but honestly, all along i was distressedly calm (or at least im not blaming anyone =P); hahaha...is there such a term?... Oh well... i think i kept that distressed look when i approached the control station in Clementi explaining my other "misfortune", and i guess acting came all natural... Or maybe i became an "actress" because what i acted is the real me (*wink wink*), effortless to beg and be scary at the same time...hahahahaaha... Well, the control man got mercy on me and gave me that mrt ride as a free one, but i have to pay 15 bucks for a new ez link. (the man cheered me up, he gave me an uplifting smile so i realized what happened to me wasn't at all bad... it gave other people the opportunity to do good =)... and be glad with what they did...)Well, the new EZ link is like the blue version of the one i lost... Although the pink design was way exquisite...
There... I got out of the station, rushed off indignantly for the nearest shoe shop. I got myself laughed at by a guy salesperson and typically got fooled/duped when they said the pair i liked was new. I knew it wasn't but anyway i find the design elegant so i bought it anyway; it was "low" quality or at least the shiny stuff on the sole got scraped off after the night, but in terms of price, in the Phil, i could've bought a nicer quality and nicer design in a lower price (the one i envied in Victo plaza--> i couldn't buy it because i already bought a new one from g-mall). It was well, a lil expensive... In fairness, the sandal, when on my feet, looks perfectly okay; it over-all gave me satisfaction, so in Sing Dollar term, i'm satisfied... no regrets...
Okay, so there... Sandal issue and EZ link issue solved... Back to the train, i was glad that my kor, josh and tuk were already in Orchard, although they waited for me outside.. I was expecting only Tuk... but oh well, nice friends are nice friends, you can't simply stop them from caring for you... hehe =P... Thanks! =)
Got a lil messy when i reached somerset because we didn't meet right away... Then there was chingay parade, and i saw a number of sexy american cheer leaders! hehe... im not lesbian kk? i'm also "sexy"...hahahaha... well that's according to Michael Gamalinda! =P
So we went off... and read kor's blog you'd know what happened inside...
as for me... i drank about 2 to 2.5 glasses of vodka... danced with Daniel (no not from KR, the one with Qiyin)... and then avoided him afterwards... maybe it's all my instinct... I don't want intimacy from a total stranger (even if it's one-sided like only he) so i wanted badly to go away from them, that's why when evelyn left, i somehow signalled Kor that we should leave too... and that was the time we looked for seats... Inside though i wanted to dance with KR people (which eventually happened while Kor danced again with her partner and Sundeep on the right)...LOL... i felt ashamed though... how i wished i went to a pub where nobody knows me!=P
that's about it! I just gave detail to the before KR bash...
and yeah... I reached the place around 10 pm... late! hehe... Oh well... it was just another uninteresting program... coz of the smokey, crowded, suffocating venue...sorry KR bash organizers! the venue just turned me off... or maybe because it was my first time on a Pub in Spore...
so yah
this sunday, i was blessed to meet Ricky Sanchez. I was dearly blessed to hear the song by Gary V. : "the warrior is a child" (Ricky composed it i think... did he?)... yeah... cool to meet in person a real proffesional song writer!
and SFS1 lesson was something... Got to know the enemy! satan and his demons (lucifer and the rest of the fallen angels)... We are in constant battle against them, everywhere... Even ryt now while i'm writing this...
God bless everyone! And always, always, TRUST in the Lord!
P.S. TITLE ISSUE
the fun i've missed? well, ryt now many Filipinos are in Sentosa, having fun, i thought Kor and Josh wouldn't go, but the probability of doing so, i thought, was small coz i think the two have overslept... I also turned down a FREE SAFARI NIGHT ticket, why? because I have something to do due tom. Nope not school stuff, but about an eternal investment... Sigh... SAFARI ZONE! I miss the tigers! =(.. but well... Opportunity cost of doing my DG assign, are sentosa fun with friends and Safari Night with wonderful saints... I believe what God would reveal to me by tomorrow is worth all those fun stuff =). ¶ 9:27 PM 0 comments
i missed kinda lot of fun!
seems like Kor lured someone... haha... basically the main reason why i didn't continue dancing with my partner the other night. I don't want another guy... Or well at least not even at personal level unless you were that guy that kept my eyes hooked on... hehe... clue? he's from temasek =P... oh..that clue i believe should be more than enough for those who would desperately do some investigation. I don't want to disclose his name either coz he's a local with chinese name, and chinese names ya know are hard to pronounce and worse, spell! hahaha....
Okie what really happened the other night? I believe the others, Kor and Josh, wouldn't want to tell the whole story, because the event (before the bash) basically revolved around my misfortune, thus, giving me "more right" to divulge it to the world. The major reason why i want to forget that night, not that i smelled like cigarrette practically from head to toe afterwards, but rather it didn't really went off well... First trouble, my sandal broke down after taking the taxi from 200 bus stop near pgp, that was around 8:30 i guess and the rouge program starts at 9 pm. It was like a mentos thing, one got a heel and the other got none, and apparently josh got some mentos and I grabbed a piece... Shux! it was mentos stuff when i went to the train platform, looked for a bleacher and attempted in removing the other heel. (in Josh's term pa, grace under stress...hehehe...thanks josh for terming it more nicely). Well, im not blaming tuk for stopping me in separating the sandal part properly from its heel and suggested instead a more destructable one... It's all i believe, part of God's plan, so Kor, it wasn't at all your fault, i didn't tell you on the train because i was "sad", i'm not blaming anyone at all; i was just thinking, trying to look at the brighter side of things (actually from a third party point of view, what happened to me was hilarious!)... hehe... a series of misfortunes... =)... so there, the attempt of removing the other heel was a total fiasco. There was an unheeled slipper, which i think looked cool, and a heeled one, smiling, with a strap on the loose.
Minutes later when the train headed for pasir ris came, and since we were discussing whether to go to clementi or not (i "argued" that they go ahead but they didn't want to, they want to accompany me else they'd feel bad as well... i wanted them to go ahead because i'm the type of person who really doesn't want to waste other people's time because of my "misfortune" or more like because of what happened to me... I'm one of those who loves to say "the show must go on, go without me", it was also around 8:40 and Somerset is still quite far); we rushed to the train... There silence and well, for my part, thinking. A lot of ideas came to my head, and josh suggested quite a number of good ones. But heck, ya know i'm indecisive; ideas were good , they kept coming and all the more kept me confused. The obvious wasn't at all there (for me). Tanjong Pagar Station: I groped my bag in the hope of my EZ link card, none. My pockets none; then i realized that i was holding my EZ-link while i was looking for a bleacher (remember the mentos stuff earlier?), and we rushed off to the train: that trimmed down the look-out to the bleacher... Yep, i left my EZ-link card on the bleacher, and i "feared" that it's already stolen... More bad feelings building up... More thoughts... like remembering the time when I wanted to replace my ez-link with a new one because i misplaced the old one (coz that time i definitely have no choice but to do so), and yeah.. i have to buy a pair of slippers too, but got to handle the imbalanced height and the weird looking pair of slippers im wearin. So, one station, (was it tanjong pagar? or outram? hmmm....) i rushed off to the opposite train, giving the 3 people i'm with no choice but to stay on the train (hehe...ooops... coz trust me, i want them badly to go ahead). And thanks to Tuk for keeping the heel of my unheeled slipper on her bag =).
So there I was... Alone... Nah! I wasn't... I was asking Him what and/or why. I was calm... although when karen called for josh on my way back to bouna vista, i was distressed... can barely control though, but honestly, all along i was distressedly calm (or at least im not blaming anyone =P); hahaha...is there such a term?... Oh well... i think i kept that distressed look when i approached the control station in Clementi explaining my other "misfortune", and i guess acting came all natural... Or maybe i became an "actress" because what i acted is the real me (*wink wink*), effortless to beg and be scary at the same time...hahahahaaha... Well, the control man got mercy on me and gave me that mrt ride as a free one, but i have to pay 15 bucks for a new ez link. (the man cheered me up, he gave me an uplifting smile so i realized what happened to me wasn't at all bad... it gave other people the opportunity to do good =)... and be glad with what they did...)Well, the new EZ link is like the blue version of the one i lost... Although the pink design was way exquisite...
There... I got out of the station, rushed off indignantly for the nearest shoe shop. I got myself laughed at by a guy salesperson and typically got fooled/duped when they said the pair i liked was new. I knew it wasn't but anyway i find the design elegant so i bought it anyway; it was "low" quality or at least the shiny stuff on the sole got scraped off after the night, but in terms of price, in the Phil, i could've bought a nicer quality and nicer design in a lower price (the one i envied in Victo plaza--> i couldn't buy it because i already bought a new one from g-mall). It was well, a lil expensive... In fairness, the sandal, when on my feet, looks perfectly okay; it over-all gave me satisfaction, so in Sing Dollar term, i'm satisfied... no regrets...
Okay, so there... Sandal issue and EZ link issue solved... Back to the train, i was glad that my kor, josh and tuk were already in Orchard, although they waited for me outside.. I was expecting only Tuk... but oh well, nice friends are nice friends, you can't simply stop them from caring for you... hehe =P... Thanks! =)
Got a lil messy when i reached somerset because we didn't meet right away... Then there was chingay parade, and i saw a number of sexy american cheer leaders! hehe... im not lesbian kk? i'm also "sexy"...hahahaha... well that's according to Michael Gamalinda! =P
So we went off... and read kor's blog you'd know what happened inside...
as for me... i drank about 2 to 2.5 glasses of vodka... danced with Daniel (no not from KR, the one with Qiyin)... and then avoided him afterwards... maybe it's all my instinct... I don't want intimacy from a total stranger (even if it's one-sided like only he) so i wanted badly to go away from them, that's why when evelyn left, i somehow signalled Kor that we should leave too... and that was the time we looked for seats... Inside though i wanted to dance with KR people (which eventually happened while Kor danced again with her partner and Sundeep on the right)...LOL... i felt ashamed though... how i wished i went to a pub where nobody knows me!=P
that's about it! I just gave detail to the before KR bash...
and yeah... I reached the place around 10 pm... late! hehe... Oh well... it was just another uninteresting program... coz of the smokey, crowded, suffocating venue...sorry KR bash organizers! the venue just turned me off... or maybe because it was my first time on a Pub in Spore...
so yah
this sunday, i was blessed to meet Ricky Sanchez. I was dearly blessed to hear the song by Gary V. : "the warrior is a child" (Ricky composed it i think... did he?)... yeah... cool to meet in person a real proffesional song writer!
and SFS1 lesson was something... Got to know the enemy! satan and his demons (lucifer and the rest of the fallen angels)... We are in constant battle against them, everywhere... Even ryt now while i'm writing this...
God bless everyone! And always, always, TRUST in the Lord!
P.S. TITLE ISSUE
the fun i've missed? well, ryt now many Filipinos are in Sentosa, having fun, i thought Kor and Josh wouldn't go, but the probability of doing so, i thought, was small coz i think the two have overslept... I also turned down a FREE SAFARI NIGHT ticket, why? because I have something to do due tom. Nope not school stuff, but about an eternal investment... Sigh... SAFARI ZONE! I miss the tigers! =(.. but well... Opportunity cost of doing my DG assign, are sentosa fun with friends and Safari Night with wonderful saints... I believe what God would reveal to me by tomorrow is worth all those fun stuff =). ¶ 9:27 PM 0 comments
if God could grant me three wishes
1. I want to go to my real home
2. I want to eradicate the nite of Feb 19
3. (reserved for future rainy days)
sigh.... ¶ 4:18 AM 0 comments
2. I want to eradicate the nite of Feb 19
3. (reserved for future rainy days)
sigh.... ¶ 4:18 AM 0 comments
Saturday, February 19, 2005
rant and rant and rant in dialect!
samok! samok! makalagot ning isa ka Pinoy na nagachat sa ako. Taga diri hinuon sa Singapore, unya nakit-an ko niya didto sa amigo-ter . nagkainterest cguro kay naa ko sa lugar na ni mao iya ko gichat... siyempre ako buotan gud daw kuno, so syempre wala nako gichapa. Karon ginachat na ko niya sa msn, ingon niya kanako nga kinse ka tuig na siya dianhi... dah... mao jud! kay ang una jud nako naisip kay pangit ang karakter or siguro spoiled brat, basta kanang murag naughty naughty boy, as in naughty nga berde. nganong naingon nako na? simple lang! abi niya cheap ko na babae na mupatol sa iya, abi pa jud niya na naa nay nahitabo sa ako ug sa akong "uyab" (paranoid, niingon lang gani ko na naa koy kachat na close friend, si Steph, giconclude dayun niya na naa koy uyab, myt as well bluff that person)... unya naa pa siya'y balak na... asus ayaw na... dili ko GRO! excuse me! as in kung siya na lang pud, over my dead body! puhleeeezzzzzz!
sensya... i'm just irritated with this ill-thinking sumbody... dapat mahibal-an niya na ang mga babae gikan sa Pinas (lyk me) conservative, and may dignity... argh! pahambog pa na adtuon ko niya diri sa hall with their car, whatever! unsa ko pick-up girl? heck!
=( =( =(
=[ !!!!!!!!!!! ¶ 6:08 PM 1 comments
sensya... i'm just irritated with this ill-thinking sumbody... dapat mahibal-an niya na ang mga babae gikan sa Pinas (lyk me) conservative, and may dignity... argh! pahambog pa na adtuon ko niya diri sa hall with their car, whatever! unsa ko pick-up girl? heck!
=( =( =(
=[ !!!!!!!!!!! ¶ 6:08 PM 1 comments
Wednesday, February 16, 2005
what!
what would you do if you intentionally missed 5 hours of lecture because you tried so hard to understand how your computer works?
sigh... what would you do if still have two more programs to write knowing that you still have to do more and more hall-related activities?
what would you do if you were at first trying to close the gap of behind the lessons and getting there when suddenly something unexpected came up just to further increase the gap?
what would you do if you have a practise exercise by Friday, and yet on thursday night you have your first ever dance practise?
what would you do if midterms are coming, paper assignments are out, and in a week's time their coming to steal the smile off you (because you typically never started anything yet)?
what would you do if you met someone attractive yet he's still a big stranger? (hahahaha... hmmm... la lang... this thing is kinda far-fetched and entirely illogical...)
what? what?
My Lord said:
"Do not worry about your life"
"Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?"
"Do not set your heart on what you will [have to submit or exams to take]; do not worry about them... Your Father knows that you [have to do them]. But seek His kingdom and these things will be given to you as well."--> like A+...hahahaha ^_^
{Luke 12:22-31}
Solomon said:
"Everything under the sun is meaningless."--> hihi ^_^ read Ecclesiastes, and be sure to read the whole book so you'll understand what i really mean by this. ¶ 6:13 PM 0 comments
sigh... what would you do if still have two more programs to write knowing that you still have to do more and more hall-related activities?
what would you do if you were at first trying to close the gap of behind the lessons and getting there when suddenly something unexpected came up just to further increase the gap?
what would you do if you have a practise exercise by Friday, and yet on thursday night you have your first ever dance practise?
what would you do if midterms are coming, paper assignments are out, and in a week's time their coming to steal the smile off you (because you typically never started anything yet)?
what would you do if you met someone attractive yet he's still a big stranger? (hahahaha... hmmm... la lang... this thing is kinda far-fetched and entirely illogical...)
what? what?
My Lord said:
"Do not worry about your life"
"Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?"
"Do not set your heart on what you will [have to submit or exams to take]; do not worry about them... Your Father knows that you [have to do them]. But seek His kingdom and these things will be given to you as well."--> like A+...hahahaha ^_^
{Luke 12:22-31}
Solomon said:
"Everything under the sun is meaningless."--> hihi ^_^ read Ecclesiastes, and be sure to read the whole book so you'll understand what i really mean by this. ¶ 6:13 PM 0 comments
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
SEXY VALENTINE!
hahahaha!
what a title! just a little twist of words, and your eyes are now "rolling" to read what's on this post.
trust me, this is for real... hehe... something blogworthy in fact!
how was my valentines day?
well, it started with Kor's little note on my door. And then dang! My day was suddenly taken away! Thanks to my computer, and my craziness (accdg to Mr. Lawyer), i typically wasted the day. But just like what i said in my earlier post, valentines day for me is just like any other normal day with something to expect. As for me, i expected to see a lot of "shows"... Other people's businesses that is, when guys give flowers, chocs, bears and all those stuff to girls. And girls go stroll around carrying the gifts with them, and even the guy... hehe...
great.. i was seeing all those stuff and yet at the back of my mind, my computer is "dying". God knows how many times i tried installing windows XP and it's either i just cant fully install it, or i just can't connect to the internet. I pity Mr. hard for getting reformatted to FAT32, then NFTS then FAT32 many many times over... sigh... My attempts were all in dire vain...
i didn't do any school related stuff and i don't know how doomed i'll get in my SS tutorial later (which i barely survived the last time thanks to some "bluffing" techniques)... sigh...
but guess what? I'm glad! Coz i'm able to post this! Well sorry to Mr. Lawyer but i have thought of resorting to him after getting drained and then getting my nerves back to near normal again. I should have done it earlier... Hehe... Thanks Prabs! A lot! Haha... You are surely fun to talk with! I don't know which of them really made sense though (hehe...just kidding --> in case you happen to land on this side of the internet)... Made a number of interesting discoveries though, and got my computer recovered from the near death experience. Back in a much better form i hope =). But in the case of considering who is the cutest guy in A block... Hmmm... I'll really think about it if i could find spare time (considering that i'm behind my lectures). =) ... I'll really think hard...
hehe...
oh well!
Carpe Diem Everyone!
Happy Birthday Robs!
God bless!
and yeah... My sexy valentine? It's GIDEON....
(my new computer name... hahahaha)
and yeah... i better get an SP2 soon...
what's so blogworthy about this?
I'm just glad that I'm connected again =) ¶ 4:11 AM 0 comments
what a title! just a little twist of words, and your eyes are now "rolling" to read what's on this post.
trust me, this is for real... hehe... something blogworthy in fact!
how was my valentines day?
well, it started with Kor's little note on my door. And then dang! My day was suddenly taken away! Thanks to my computer, and my craziness (accdg to Mr. Lawyer), i typically wasted the day. But just like what i said in my earlier post, valentines day for me is just like any other normal day with something to expect. As for me, i expected to see a lot of "shows"... Other people's businesses that is, when guys give flowers, chocs, bears and all those stuff to girls. And girls go stroll around carrying the gifts with them, and even the guy... hehe...
great.. i was seeing all those stuff and yet at the back of my mind, my computer is "dying". God knows how many times i tried installing windows XP and it's either i just cant fully install it, or i just can't connect to the internet. I pity Mr. hard for getting reformatted to FAT32, then NFTS then FAT32 many many times over... sigh... My attempts were all in dire vain...
i didn't do any school related stuff and i don't know how doomed i'll get in my SS tutorial later (which i barely survived the last time thanks to some "bluffing" techniques)... sigh...
but guess what? I'm glad! Coz i'm able to post this! Well sorry to Mr. Lawyer but i have thought of resorting to him after getting drained and then getting my nerves back to near normal again. I should have done it earlier... Hehe... Thanks Prabs! A lot! Haha... You are surely fun to talk with! I don't know which of them really made sense though (hehe...just kidding --> in case you happen to land on this side of the internet)... Made a number of interesting discoveries though, and got my computer recovered from the near death experience. Back in a much better form i hope =). But in the case of considering who is the cutest guy in A block... Hmmm... I'll really think about it if i could find spare time (considering that i'm behind my lectures). =) ... I'll really think hard...
hehe...
oh well!
Carpe Diem Everyone!
Happy Birthday Robs!
God bless!
and yeah... My sexy valentine? It's GIDEON....
(my new computer name... hahahaha)
and yeah... i better get an SP2 soon...
what's so blogworthy about this?
I'm just glad that I'm connected again =) ¶ 4:11 AM 0 comments
Thursday, February 10, 2005
this test result is just sooooo me!
What's Your Eating Style?
ivy, you're an Indulgent Eater
You, more than others, truly gain satisfaction from eating. And because of this, you sometimes have difficulty slowing down or just saying no. You enjoy eating and what's great about that is you understand how to appreciate certain aspects of food that others do not. You see food as more than just a source of nutrition or energy. For you, dining, or just plain eating, can be a really enjoyable experience. On the downside, however, you might sometimes indulge too much in the satisfaction you get from eating.
by web.tickle.com
--about the highlighted one, it trully explains why i see myself eating dishes that many don't feel like eating... yeah, i do appreciate dishes for who they are, whether they are meant to be salty, bitter, sour or whatever. When I eat I don't go for how a food should taste like for me but how the food taste like for what it is. Hehe... It is also so true that i have difficulty in slowing down and saying no to food. Food trully is an indulgence for me, almost in every form!
¶ 11:57 AM 2 comments
ivy, you're an Indulgent Eater
You, more than others, truly gain satisfaction from eating. And because of this, you sometimes have difficulty slowing down or just saying no. You enjoy eating and what's great about that is you understand how to appreciate certain aspects of food that others do not. You see food as more than just a source of nutrition or energy. For you, dining, or just plain eating, can be a really enjoyable experience. On the downside, however, you might sometimes indulge too much in the satisfaction you get from eating.
by web.tickle.com
--about the highlighted one, it trully explains why i see myself eating dishes that many don't feel like eating... yeah, i do appreciate dishes for who they are, whether they are meant to be salty, bitter, sour or whatever. When I eat I don't go for how a food should taste like for me but how the food taste like for what it is. Hehe... It is also so true that i have difficulty in slowing down and saying no to food. Food trully is an indulgence for me, almost in every form!
¶ 11:57 AM 2 comments
Wednesday, February 09, 2005
wala lang...
There are so many things to appreciate life for. For one, I appreciate this opportunity of writing down my thoughts in this kind of blog. I may not know who reads this or if anyone reads this at all, but the important thing is that I have this as an outlet of some things I just can't openly discuss or discuss at all in any personal conversation. This is more like talking to myself and to anyone who might be interested in reading whatever is going on in my mind.
I appreciate life for all her ups and downs. Emotions involved in such situations do affect my way of thinking and mood at any point; however, one thing remains the same, they all make up life not an easy task but an exciting, mysterious, and over-all wonderful gift. Currently, I may be at this empty state and I believe only God knows exactly why, but I am certain that it wont stay forever this way. Not a chance at all. =). Maybe ups and downs are more often described as spices of life because some taste overly sweet, others utterly bitter, while the rest are of some sort, and that when individually eaten in one sitting is disgustingly inappropriate. We neither put one kind of spice in one dish, nor put too much and all of them in a recipe. For different dishes, different combinations of concentrations are needed like for different people, different experiences unfold, different ups and downs, albeit similarities do exist, and some even are intertwined.
God is a great cook, but He gave us this free-will of how we would want end up. Although it may sound confusing, that He is the cook and yet it seems like we still have a choice on the outcome of our lives, one thing I am certain of, God has a bigger picture of everything, He knows when to intervene and when to allow our insistence. He simply knows what He is doing and when... But then again life can't be simply describe by something we do in the kitchen. Life is far more mysterious and even complicated than just that, and my limited knowledge can just safely without further confusion say that.
I perfectly know I'm not a life expert, for I also got my own life to "unravel", but these are just things I can fairly share about my view of life. Although somebody once told me not to try to understand the reasons behind everything because we will never will (just trust in the Lord in everything), I'll still try to get hold of something. I still attempt to get an acceptable reason for the sake of going on peacefully, because as somebody far from perfect, I have the tendency of falling away from putting up that full trust (hopefully, I'll get there with stability). Reasons like: God has a reason for this, maybe He wants me to learn something, and (a more direct one) He doesn't want me to do this, suffice although there can be more specific and worldly oriented ones... I guess it's for the sake of reflection, as part of my learning process. Anyway, this is just merely some form of disclaimer...
Sigh...
I recently observed my selfish reactions to certain unprecedented events. I do them without realizing that they were direly selfish; although those reactions may not harm anyone, they are entirely selfish (but I believe different from being utterly self-centered). I still sigh about them though... Luckily, one thing so lovable yet hateful in life is always there: change...
wups!... An hour just passed since I started writing this entry... Better wrap up =)
Wrap up!
hehe...
God bless!
Carpe Diem
P.S. We watched Feng Shui the other night (in Cathay Orchard), and I just realized that the character played by Kris Aquino should by right die; die not in some tiger whatever (because she was born in the year of the tiger--> watch the movie and you'll know why), more on like the consequence of breaking the bagua wrongly...
P.S.S. Feng Shui is a well done horror movie! haha... I screamed a lot!... More like a thriller movie =). Sundeep, a Mauritian (not sure of spelling), even agreed that the movie was good. Kudos to the Filipinos =)
P.S.S.S. One nice way to recover from all the scary faces in that movie is to consider that those people who played the ghostly roles are still alive and doing other stuff in show business. They were well-paid for their scary performance and they themselves were not scared of what they just did. It's only fair that we don't include the fear they incurred in our lifestyles. Besides, the faces from the movie were unreal ^_^. ¶ 9:43 PM 0 comments
I appreciate life for all her ups and downs. Emotions involved in such situations do affect my way of thinking and mood at any point; however, one thing remains the same, they all make up life not an easy task but an exciting, mysterious, and over-all wonderful gift. Currently, I may be at this empty state and I believe only God knows exactly why, but I am certain that it wont stay forever this way. Not a chance at all. =). Maybe ups and downs are more often described as spices of life because some taste overly sweet, others utterly bitter, while the rest are of some sort, and that when individually eaten in one sitting is disgustingly inappropriate. We neither put one kind of spice in one dish, nor put too much and all of them in a recipe. For different dishes, different combinations of concentrations are needed like for different people, different experiences unfold, different ups and downs, albeit similarities do exist, and some even are intertwined.
God is a great cook, but He gave us this free-will of how we would want end up. Although it may sound confusing, that He is the cook and yet it seems like we still have a choice on the outcome of our lives, one thing I am certain of, God has a bigger picture of everything, He knows when to intervene and when to allow our insistence. He simply knows what He is doing and when... But then again life can't be simply describe by something we do in the kitchen. Life is far more mysterious and even complicated than just that, and my limited knowledge can just safely without further confusion say that.
I perfectly know I'm not a life expert, for I also got my own life to "unravel", but these are just things I can fairly share about my view of life. Although somebody once told me not to try to understand the reasons behind everything because we will never will (just trust in the Lord in everything), I'll still try to get hold of something. I still attempt to get an acceptable reason for the sake of going on peacefully, because as somebody far from perfect, I have the tendency of falling away from putting up that full trust (hopefully, I'll get there with stability). Reasons like: God has a reason for this, maybe He wants me to learn something, and (a more direct one) He doesn't want me to do this, suffice although there can be more specific and worldly oriented ones... I guess it's for the sake of reflection, as part of my learning process. Anyway, this is just merely some form of disclaimer...
Sigh...
I recently observed my selfish reactions to certain unprecedented events. I do them without realizing that they were direly selfish; although those reactions may not harm anyone, they are entirely selfish (but I believe different from being utterly self-centered). I still sigh about them though... Luckily, one thing so lovable yet hateful in life is always there: change...
wups!... An hour just passed since I started writing this entry... Better wrap up =)
Wrap up!
hehe...
God bless!
Carpe Diem
P.S. We watched Feng Shui the other night (in Cathay Orchard), and I just realized that the character played by Kris Aquino should by right die; die not in some tiger whatever (because she was born in the year of the tiger--> watch the movie and you'll know why), more on like the consequence of breaking the bagua wrongly...
P.S.S. Feng Shui is a well done horror movie! haha... I screamed a lot!... More like a thriller movie =). Sundeep, a Mauritian (not sure of spelling), even agreed that the movie was good. Kudos to the Filipinos =)
P.S.S.S. One nice way to recover from all the scary faces in that movie is to consider that those people who played the ghostly roles are still alive and doing other stuff in show business. They were well-paid for their scary performance and they themselves were not scared of what they just did. It's only fair that we don't include the fear they incurred in our lifestyles. Besides, the faces from the movie were unreal ^_^. ¶ 9:43 PM 0 comments
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
valentine "sickness", new year madness
Valentines day is drawing near. Friendster symptoms are showing up. People posting love stuff, selling for love stuff, whatever valentines stuff... Heck, although i find Feb 14 just another ordinary day, like how i spend it for 18 years, i still expect some things to happen. I mean, as an audience to other people's affairs, i kind of feel excited for their lives =)... Back to friendster, i came over this nice poem... or something... I think it is written by a girl but if a guy wrote it, that guy sure does know a lot about girls! =P... Haha... again... this is so not me... i just appreciate the thoughts. Here it is:
Tell her you think shes cool.
Tell her why you think shes so cool.
Smell her hair.
Talk to her in movie theatres.
Pick her up and pretend youre going to throwherin the river;
shell scream and fight you butsecretly, she`ll love it.
Hold her hand and skip.Hold her hand and run.
Just hold her hand.
Pick flowersfrom other people's gardens and givethem to her.
Tell her she's pretty.
Let her pay if she wants to.
Introduce her to your friends as
The coolest girl you know.
Sit in the park and talk to her.
JUST TALK TO HER.
Take her to the library
TAKE HER ANYWHERE.
Tell her dirty jokes.
TELL HER HAPPY STORIES.
TELL HER SAD STORIES.
TELL HER YOUR STORIES.
TELL HER ANYTHING
Tell her stupid jokes.
Write poems about her.
Just walk with her.
Throw pebbles at her window
When she starts swearing at you,...
tell her you love her.
Take her to shows of
bands shes neverheard of.
Hold her hand in the mosh pit.
Let her fall asleep in your arms.
Call her.
Call her back if she calls you.
Sing to her,
no matter howbad you are.
Carve your names into a tree.
Get her mad,
then kiss her.
Give her piggy-back rides.
Go see her band play
even if they really suck,and tell her they were great.
Give her space if she needs it.
Push her on swings.
Stay up with her all night when shes sick.
Make up pet names for her,
but cool ones, not sappy ones.
Teach her guitar.
Lend her your cds.
Write on her.
WRITE ABOUT HER.
Make her mixtapes.
Write her letters.
Take her to cool shops,
and let her take you to even cooler ones.
Just hang outwith her.
Listen to all thebands she mentions.
Dont tell her that her favorite bands suck.
When shes sad,hang out with her
or stay on the phone with her,even if shes not saying anything.
Buy her ice cream.
Let her take all the photos of you she wants.
Look into her eyes.
Slow dance with her,
even if the music is fast.
TELL HER A SECRET.
Kiss her in the rain...
JUST KISS HER.
TRUST HER.
LOVE HER.
BE YOURSELF AROUND HER.
CHERISH HER
and when you fall in love
with her tell her...
I LOVE U!
....haha ain't it sweet?
IT'S CHINESE NEW YEAR EVE HERE! AND THAT MEANS DISCOUNTS! BIG BIG DISCOUNTS! I WANT TO SHOP BEFORE ALL THE STORES CLOSE! I WANT I WANT! BUT HAHA... I CAN'T FIND TIME! WAAA... I WISH I SHOPPED YESTERDAY... NOW IT'S LIKE...NOW OR NEVER??!!!!!!
I'M MAD!
¶ 2:26 PM 0 comments
Tell her you think shes cool.
Tell her why you think shes so cool.
Smell her hair.
Talk to her in movie theatres.
Pick her up and pretend youre going to throwherin the river;
shell scream and fight you butsecretly, she`ll love it.
Hold her hand and skip.Hold her hand and run.
Just hold her hand.
Pick flowersfrom other people's gardens and givethem to her.
Tell her she's pretty.
Let her pay if she wants to.
Introduce her to your friends as
The coolest girl you know.
Sit in the park and talk to her.
JUST TALK TO HER.
Take her to the library
TAKE HER ANYWHERE.
Tell her dirty jokes.
TELL HER HAPPY STORIES.
TELL HER SAD STORIES.
TELL HER YOUR STORIES.
TELL HER ANYTHING
Tell her stupid jokes.
Write poems about her.
Just walk with her.
Throw pebbles at her window
When she starts swearing at you,...
tell her you love her.
Take her to shows of
bands shes neverheard of.
Hold her hand in the mosh pit.
Let her fall asleep in your arms.
Call her.
Call her back if she calls you.
Sing to her,
no matter howbad you are.
Carve your names into a tree.
Get her mad,
then kiss her.
Give her piggy-back rides.
Go see her band play
even if they really suck,and tell her they were great.
Give her space if she needs it.
Push her on swings.
Stay up with her all night when shes sick.
Make up pet names for her,
but cool ones, not sappy ones.
Teach her guitar.
Lend her your cds.
Write on her.
WRITE ABOUT HER.
Make her mixtapes.
Write her letters.
Take her to cool shops,
and let her take you to even cooler ones.
Just hang outwith her.
Listen to all thebands she mentions.
Dont tell her that her favorite bands suck.
When shes sad,hang out with her
or stay on the phone with her,even if shes not saying anything.
Buy her ice cream.
Let her take all the photos of you she wants.
Look into her eyes.
Slow dance with her,
even if the music is fast.
TELL HER A SECRET.
Kiss her in the rain...
JUST KISS HER.
TRUST HER.
LOVE HER.
BE YOURSELF AROUND HER.
CHERISH HER
and when you fall in love
with her tell her...
I LOVE U!
....haha ain't it sweet?
IT'S CHINESE NEW YEAR EVE HERE! AND THAT MEANS DISCOUNTS! BIG BIG DISCOUNTS! I WANT TO SHOP BEFORE ALL THE STORES CLOSE! I WANT I WANT! BUT HAHA... I CAN'T FIND TIME! WAAA... I WISH I SHOPPED YESTERDAY... NOW IT'S LIKE...NOW OR NEVER??!!!!!!
I'M MAD!
¶ 2:26 PM 0 comments
Monday, February 07, 2005
to all flirting men in the internet...
hehe...
i already know your style, and i don't buy it!
please lang...
if you ask me, I prefer personal over virtual... and speaking of relationships, i strongly believe i'm simply the wrong person to deal with.
dami super duper pretty girls (and i'm nothing compared to them) sa net who are more receptive than me; or maybe simply not like me, maybe they are more deserving candidates...
la lang... i'm just tired of school, of all the hustles, of all the whatevas around me, and now, this too!
I'm simply here for friendship... =) i can help you out though in yer courtships =P
¶ 9:38 PM 0 comments
i already know your style, and i don't buy it!
please lang...
if you ask me, I prefer personal over virtual... and speaking of relationships, i strongly believe i'm simply the wrong person to deal with.
dami super duper pretty girls (and i'm nothing compared to them) sa net who are more receptive than me; or maybe simply not like me, maybe they are more deserving candidates...
la lang... i'm just tired of school, of all the hustles, of all the whatevas around me, and now, this too!
I'm simply here for friendship... =) i can help you out though in yer courtships =P
¶ 9:38 PM 0 comments
sddjhiag agjhfuit afvndsvihe
Actually, I do not know what title i should use for this entry. Basically, i have no good idea at all... So bear with me =)
This is my second attempt to write this entry thanks to the instability of IE plus maybe MS. Oh well, i hope i could still recall what I've written hours earlier... =P
Here:
Well, ummm...
Academically speaking, i bet you'd expect me to say this but i'll say it anyway: I'm still behind. But slowly, like a turtle, I'm catching up. Better late than never or at least better make it this way than end up purely cramming when papers start coming in. Oh well... I can't wait for May!!!! BTW, 3rd of May is the last day for my finals! Hehe... I want May! May! May!
Wups! Yah... May because by that time i'll finally see people i've never seen in my entire life! Lovely people that is, because they're my relatives ^_^. And it's homeward bound! I miss home! I miss my family! I miss Davao! Dang! I direly miss the place. Even though Davao streets are less urbanized than Singapore's, trust me, I'd prefer having a glance of her streets rather than stroll around the trully first world streets... Well, Kor and I had enough of that! I mean, we already took our time wandering around this country unintentionally... Nothing like getting lost again and again...haha... it was quite a walking adventure though, like a normalized thing on our part ^_^... Okay back to the Davao streets... I surely miss 'em; i'll never forget the times when i just loiter around the places... Davao is relatively safe compared to other cities in the Phil... or maybe at least i don't look like a potential victim...harhar... more like the criminal! eheh... Oh well! I will wait, my Lord will wait with me too =)... SO hopefully, the waiting isn't waiting at all! =)
Oh, I'd also like to share about what I've learned from my church hours ago... TRUST GOD IN EVERYTHING, THEN ENJOY LIFE!... There's much to it than just that! Ask Solomon how he made researches in his life (read Ecclesiastes), and what are his findings. It is interesting to know that people nowadays are no different from the people in Solomon's time (that meant thousands of years ago), because people still search for the same kind of thing in this life. I mean, human nature never really changed, the things that changed are the way we try to satisfy ourselves, but the need/want for this something and the drive of looking for this are basically the same. Thanks to Solomon for setting himself as an example of someone finding due satisfaction from money, all forms of pleasure, women and other worldly pursuits; indeed, he tried everything to his ruin i guess... I don't know what will happen to Solomon after turning to other gods, but maybe i'll know someday although it wouldn't be much of my business by then... Well, I guess one important thing to learn is that we can never find unlimited peace/satisfaction in this limited world and limited understanding for some bigger reason/picture that we cannot comprehend yet. But just trust in our Lord =). He perfectly knows what He is doing; He sees what's in the end... Besides, the end doesn't justify the means, but one thing is certain, the end is surely for our ultimate good. It would weigh manifold than all the possible means of getting there combined =)... Isn't He mysteriously wonderful? I think so! =) We just let Him! and then we enjoy this life (while trusting Him =) )...
CARPE DIEM!
¶ 1:45 AM 0 comments
This is my second attempt to write this entry thanks to the instability of IE plus maybe MS. Oh well, i hope i could still recall what I've written hours earlier... =P
Here:
Well, ummm...
Academically speaking, i bet you'd expect me to say this but i'll say it anyway: I'm still behind. But slowly, like a turtle, I'm catching up. Better late than never or at least better make it this way than end up purely cramming when papers start coming in. Oh well... I can't wait for May!!!! BTW, 3rd of May is the last day for my finals! Hehe... I want May! May! May!
Wups! Yah... May because by that time i'll finally see people i've never seen in my entire life! Lovely people that is, because they're my relatives ^_^. And it's homeward bound! I miss home! I miss my family! I miss Davao! Dang! I direly miss the place. Even though Davao streets are less urbanized than Singapore's, trust me, I'd prefer having a glance of her streets rather than stroll around the trully first world streets... Well, Kor and I had enough of that! I mean, we already took our time wandering around this country unintentionally... Nothing like getting lost again and again...haha... it was quite a walking adventure though, like a normalized thing on our part ^_^... Okay back to the Davao streets... I surely miss 'em; i'll never forget the times when i just loiter around the places... Davao is relatively safe compared to other cities in the Phil... or maybe at least i don't look like a potential victim...harhar... more like the criminal! eheh... Oh well! I will wait, my Lord will wait with me too =)... SO hopefully, the waiting isn't waiting at all! =)
Oh, I'd also like to share about what I've learned from my church hours ago... TRUST GOD IN EVERYTHING, THEN ENJOY LIFE!... There's much to it than just that! Ask Solomon how he made researches in his life (read Ecclesiastes), and what are his findings. It is interesting to know that people nowadays are no different from the people in Solomon's time (that meant thousands of years ago), because people still search for the same kind of thing in this life. I mean, human nature never really changed, the things that changed are the way we try to satisfy ourselves, but the need/want for this something and the drive of looking for this are basically the same. Thanks to Solomon for setting himself as an example of someone finding due satisfaction from money, all forms of pleasure, women and other worldly pursuits; indeed, he tried everything to his ruin i guess... I don't know what will happen to Solomon after turning to other gods, but maybe i'll know someday although it wouldn't be much of my business by then... Well, I guess one important thing to learn is that we can never find unlimited peace/satisfaction in this limited world and limited understanding for some bigger reason/picture that we cannot comprehend yet. But just trust in our Lord =). He perfectly knows what He is doing; He sees what's in the end... Besides, the end doesn't justify the means, but one thing is certain, the end is surely for our ultimate good. It would weigh manifold than all the possible means of getting there combined =)... Isn't He mysteriously wonderful? I think so! =) We just let Him! and then we enjoy this life (while trusting Him =) )...
CARPE DIEM!
¶ 1:45 AM 0 comments
Friday, February 04, 2005
im going to KR bash
Jiaying knocked at my door while i was sleeping... I knew she'd give me lectures of why i should show up, since i'm dead sleepy and i knew i'll end up getting "nagged", i just said...OK! hehe... i don't want to waste her strength nagging on me (trust me... she has endless reasons!)... besides, most of my teammates are going, Kor, Josh, Tuk and hopefully Navuth are going too... It must be fun! and first time clubbing at my own cost!
Yah... they were also about to use Korinna on me; but i said yes before they pushed through with their persuasion... yawn.... better hype up for tuts...
¶ 1:32 PM 0 comments
Yah... they were also about to use Korinna on me; but i said yes before they pushed through with their persuasion... yawn.... better hype up for tuts...
¶ 1:32 PM 0 comments
Thursday, February 03, 2005
well it's over
The girls we're not in their form when they played for the finals, and i was just as stunned as the supporters... The way they played the match is not how they usually play... Something went wrong somewhere, or maybe it's all part of His perfect plan. Maybe He wanted to teach us something, although we have this slight idea of something, the main thing isn't there yet...
I feel for Johnny, I feel for Christina, and the rest of the girls in the team... We know it wasn't our normal potential (far from our top potential)... Not at all, but things have to happen for reasons that we are just about to realize... I have come to appreciate people, especially our tough coach... I have indeed learned a lot, especially about commitment and discipline, although i still have to incorporate them in my life not only in vball... I can still remember the time Johnny taught me to be brave (confident) even though the ball seems far from getting reached. He made me dive for the ball even though it's really far (about my body's length), he made me want and dive for the ball; surprisingly i caught the ball and gave a good pass... although it was just a tiny event, i learned a good lesson... Even though a problem or challenge may appear unreachable, there is no such thing as impossible if you keep trying... I'll keep trying... I will... and even though i may feel disappointed at this moment, i don't want to give it all up... Nope not at all... I will still keep on fighting... There is no such thing as ending, not even for vball, not even in this life as long as i still can do something in the Lord's grace... There is no such thing as ending... It's just moving on...
I'll surely miss the girls... I'll surely surely miss them...
MEMORIES:
MY TEAM
I'LL MISS OUR DEBRIEFS
THIS MAN TAUGHT ME QUITE A LOT-> JOHNNY
¶ 1:33 AM 0 comments
I feel for Johnny, I feel for Christina, and the rest of the girls in the team... We know it wasn't our normal potential (far from our top potential)... Not at all, but things have to happen for reasons that we are just about to realize... I have come to appreciate people, especially our tough coach... I have indeed learned a lot, especially about commitment and discipline, although i still have to incorporate them in my life not only in vball... I can still remember the time Johnny taught me to be brave (confident) even though the ball seems far from getting reached. He made me dive for the ball even though it's really far (about my body's length), he made me want and dive for the ball; surprisingly i caught the ball and gave a good pass... although it was just a tiny event, i learned a good lesson... Even though a problem or challenge may appear unreachable, there is no such thing as impossible if you keep trying... I'll keep trying... I will... and even though i may feel disappointed at this moment, i don't want to give it all up... Nope not at all... I will still keep on fighting... There is no such thing as ending, not even for vball, not even in this life as long as i still can do something in the Lord's grace... There is no such thing as ending... It's just moving on...
I'll surely miss the girls... I'll surely surely miss them...
MEMORIES:
MY TEAM
I'LL MISS OUR DEBRIEFS
THIS MAN TAUGHT ME QUITE A LOT-> JOHNNY
¶ 1:33 AM 0 comments
Wednesday, February 02, 2005
NOTHIN LIKE VENTING EMOTIONS OUT
whew... After that previous post, I'm not agitated anymore. It always work when I write down my feelings whenever I'm frustrated (irritable/sad,etc) maybe because i tend to look at myself and divert the blame to nobody but me. And yep, i have to forgive myself. =) And to whoever got affected, i apologize as well... I just needed an outlet to rant on. I also shared the very sincere stuff to my JC, vented all the frustrations; such a comforting release... Now i'll just have to think of how to finish my overdue works, a whole lot of 'em! I'll mull over them in my sleep...heeeee!
later we will have our vball finals; to those who are free by 9pm, do go down to EH court, and watch my friends rock the court...hehe.. they are really superb now compared to the first time they were formed as first six =). And i'm proud to be part of a team with such a nice bunch of pretty people (and handsome-->coach...hehe). Tonight's gonna mark the end, and we will know how our days and nights of hard toil are going to payback... Who knows, TH has been known to be the consistent vball girls champion... But this year, we are the dark horse...
Carpe Diem!
¶ 1:58 PM 0 comments
later we will have our vball finals; to those who are free by 9pm, do go down to EH court, and watch my friends rock the court...hehe.. they are really superb now compared to the first time they were formed as first six =). And i'm proud to be part of a team with such a nice bunch of pretty people (and handsome-->coach...hehe). Tonight's gonna mark the end, and we will know how our days and nights of hard toil are going to payback... Who knows, TH has been known to be the consistent vball girls champion... But this year, we are the dark horse...
Carpe Diem!
¶ 1:58 PM 0 comments
These are the times when you just feel like argh....
yep...
apart from the current fact that I'm going to have 4 midterms in one day (but hopefully in God's mercy would be reduced to 3), I'm typically numb and soon to be irritable. Indeed the 4-midterm Saturday is just the perfect recipe for disaster to those who would start studying in that same week. And from the way I do things, I'm one of the potential candidates to such atrocious fate. If I don't start reviewing the soonest time I could, I'm over. The mere fact that I'm behind in all my lectures makes me unable to push through with the review... But at the moment, none of those factual stuff gives me the urgency to do something academically related.
---digression---
I guess this is the moment wherein I have to choose between having life and no life at all... That is, social life... In fact, I'm living like a lifeless being these days (but it never really shows)... Something like nobody knows me and I don't want to know them yet; they're nobody and so am I. I'm definitely irritable while i'm writing this... no wonder i must have hated a bunch of people for no valid reason a few hours ago.. argh... maybe i just don't like what's happening to me and what i have been doing lately... rationally speaking, all the time i've spent are wasted... (you must be wondering what i'm talking about ayt?...well, I also don't know exactly; i just can identify the sensation...)
So much for lack of motivation. I don't know what my Lord really wants, however, I am more confident in Him than I was yesterday--> a definite improvement... Yet, I still lack motivation... argh... i couldn't be driven by career success, wealth and the like... I feel like they are all such a waste of time for they are going to disappear anyway, if not during your lifetime, then in your death... They're not the type that lasts forever, not really worthy to invest time with or money or whatever... This is all crap...
i must be pessimistic...
----digression---
but anyway, i don't like how "ang mga taga dito" act... arrogant and stuff... i don't like the way they feel like they are superior and stuff.. i also don't like people who judge people on their appearances (esp. based on skin color... they are utter humiliation to existence! like as if being fair makes them more human... they never realized that their judgement has already turned them into a pile of excrement... nothing but unwanted nuissance...--> well, based on my friend's experience). and I don't like the way they slowly influence me...and the language...please! move away! i don't like shallow people; especially those who don't only waste my time but waste their own time as well... what the!
i am so...irritable...
what's this post for? hmm... just for this...
----digression---
adios!
¶ 1:03 AM 0 comments
apart from the current fact that I'm going to have 4 midterms in one day (but hopefully in God's mercy would be reduced to 3), I'm typically numb and soon to be irritable. Indeed the 4-midterm Saturday is just the perfect recipe for disaster to those who would start studying in that same week. And from the way I do things, I'm one of the potential candidates to such atrocious fate. If I don't start reviewing the soonest time I could, I'm over. The mere fact that I'm behind in all my lectures makes me unable to push through with the review... But at the moment, none of those factual stuff gives me the urgency to do something academically related.
---digression---
I guess this is the moment wherein I have to choose between having life and no life at all... That is, social life... In fact, I'm living like a lifeless being these days (but it never really shows)... Something like nobody knows me and I don't want to know them yet; they're nobody and so am I. I'm definitely irritable while i'm writing this... no wonder i must have hated a bunch of people for no valid reason a few hours ago.. argh... maybe i just don't like what's happening to me and what i have been doing lately... rationally speaking, all the time i've spent are wasted... (you must be wondering what i'm talking about ayt?...well, I also don't know exactly; i just can identify the sensation...)
--digression--
So much for lack of motivation. I don't know what my Lord really wants, however, I am more confident in Him than I was yesterday--> a definite improvement... Yet, I still lack motivation... argh... i couldn't be driven by career success, wealth and the like... I feel like they are all such a waste of time for they are going to disappear anyway, if not during your lifetime, then in your death... They're not the type that lasts forever, not really worthy to invest time with or money or whatever... This is all crap...
i must be pessimistic...
----digression---
but anyway, i don't like how "ang mga taga dito" act... arrogant and stuff... i don't like the way they feel like they are superior and stuff.. i also don't like people who judge people on their appearances (esp. based on skin color... they are utter humiliation to existence! like as if being fair makes them more human... they never realized that their judgement has already turned them into a pile of excrement... nothing but unwanted nuissance...--> well, based on my friend's experience). and I don't like the way they slowly influence me...and the language...please! move away! i don't like shallow people; especially those who don't only waste my time but waste their own time as well... what the!
i am so...irritable...
what's this post for? hmm... just for this...
----digression---
adios!
¶ 1:03 AM 0 comments
