i am amazed i am amazed

how could someone just detach oneself from emotions and continue on working like nothing happened. I was once capable, my mind once ruled my heart, but now it doesn't seem to be the case...

and seeing someone like me before now that I am not... I am amazed. I even don't understand how in the world they can do that!

but im pretty much amazed.

i have been sleeping too much.
i have been moving around in a world I thought real for such a long time now.
dreamland? but I guess it was just too long...
too long that I even know everything I see in that world wears a mask, and I am ignorant of what's underneath.
have I turned into a coward?
maybe.

reminds me of matrix... should I choose to play ignorant and act like everything's for real, or choose to wake up and face the painful reality.

been studying a lot of these things for the past 2 sems...and I think im having an overload of such things--> religion, philosophy, reflections, ideas... Now I understand why the Lord has not revealed everything to us... we are only humans to understand, there are so many realities that we cannot comprehend... Even this little confusions about reality disturbed me a lot, how much more understanding what reality is! But I guess I shall wait for that time, when we will all be prepared for it.... time... time will tell...

---
if you are in the right path, do not swerve... it is not cool to swerve. you will be only tormenting yourself.  ¶ 12:59 PM