Tuesday, November 29, 2005
semestral assessment
this semester is the most uhm... unspeakable of all...
I wonder... Will I become an electrical engineer? I just did bad for all my core modules and I am in a state of shock wherein it is so bad that I can't be shocked.
Do I want to become an electrical engineer? I hope I could answer that.
I know I made a good start for this semester, I think I was a better student. But before my semester ended I never expected that my already unstable concentration will shake so badly that I ended up doing seriously bad for my papers, my core papers. It's the price I paid for breaking or bending words and promises. Currently, I do not know what to do about it. I probably need some sleep to rest the mixed emotions rampaging within me. Am I supposed to be happy that all my papers are over? Or am I supposed to be sad that I did so bad? Shall I keep the great torment until results come out or shall I do some scrimage from now onwards? Why am I a masochist? A masochist who loves to have fun, slack off and become lazy when it is no longer fun. Yes, I will pay the great price for juggling my priorities so bad or maybe I already am paying.
I will not lose hope though. It has been and the only thing I've had, hope. I came here with nothing and it shouldn't be surprising that I leave here with nothing but memories and hope ^_^ for better ends. I know God is teaching me some practical lessons now and I guess they are still at their puzzling form at present since I cannot really tell what they are. I just know that they're there, flaunting.
At the moment, I'm clueless of what I'm going to do next. God help me. ¶ 3:33 PM
I wonder... Will I become an electrical engineer? I just did bad for all my core modules and I am in a state of shock wherein it is so bad that I can't be shocked.
Do I want to become an electrical engineer? I hope I could answer that.
I know I made a good start for this semester, I think I was a better student. But before my semester ended I never expected that my already unstable concentration will shake so badly that I ended up doing seriously bad for my papers, my core papers. It's the price I paid for breaking or bending words and promises. Currently, I do not know what to do about it. I probably need some sleep to rest the mixed emotions rampaging within me. Am I supposed to be happy that all my papers are over? Or am I supposed to be sad that I did so bad? Shall I keep the great torment until results come out or shall I do some scrimage from now onwards? Why am I a masochist? A masochist who loves to have fun, slack off and become lazy when it is no longer fun. Yes, I will pay the great price for juggling my priorities so bad or maybe I already am paying.
I will not lose hope though. It has been and the only thing I've had, hope. I came here with nothing and it shouldn't be surprising that I leave here with nothing but memories and hope ^_^ for better ends. I know God is teaching me some practical lessons now and I guess they are still at their puzzling form at present since I cannot really tell what they are. I just know that they're there, flaunting.
At the moment, I'm clueless of what I'm going to do next. God help me. ¶ 3:33 PM
