Friday, August 19, 2005
me and my blabbering mouth
Well sorry to whoever I have blatantly offended ages ago. Anyway, if you know who you are, please forgive me. I have gone way overboard with that, and even saying so in front of your face. I should have been a little more sensitive... I'm just too concerned over your transient regrets that I wanted to help you in a way by telling you what's happening. Maybe you just wanted more. But gee, I was of no help and created clouds between us.
Reminds me though. I was really sensitive years ago. I hated it (note the past tense) because it had hurt me so much. I'm hurting myself for no reason and nobody even knows nor cares. I wanted to be cold. It is my defense mechanism. Why should I wallow in pain while I can choose to be a bit colder myself? But then I guess there are times when I have gone overboard...
Prabs told me something which actually caught my attention (not the "hot chick" thing, he calls every girl like that i guess), which was "last year you look nice, but now you look fierce." Familiar. I've been told the similar thing when I was in my 1st and 2nd year high school. And even more familiar, the similarity of me between now and then is my short hair. I probably look assertive or fierce with it. Somehow short hair gives me some boost, it reminds me of my old self. Those happy and sad times. It really reminds me of me...
Anyway, love life. Not that I'm sick bugged with questions like " Do you have a boyfriend?" or "Where's your boyfriend?" but rather I'm tired of answering "No I don't have" and then they'd follow up like "Really?" or "Impossible" or "Sa ganda mong yan?" (no im not bragging im just saying what they were saying but like I said I don't believe them, read the "me" of this blog) "Don't have to keep it as a secret!" or "Sige na share na!". Like ahemm, I'm not like them probably. I'm aloof! I don't like flirting. I still have a lil hang-over of my teenage MH thingy. haha =P and I have other priorities and I have a promise, a promise that can prove that sometimes I do keep my word. I'm bad at promises. So there, I think it is such a common thing for everyone to think that girls or women of my age are involved in this boy-girl relationship... Sometimes it can be annoying but here's what, when I'll have a boyfriend I'll post it here. Those who read then will be one of the first people to know.
One odd thing that parents should take note. When you allow your children to have boyfriends and even encourage it by teasing them, most likely they won't have (that's my case and some people I know) but when you strictly prohibit it, as in totally banned, think again, most likely they already have. The "illegal" boyfriends. I know some too! hahahaha =)
Oh well... I dunno if some A-block people are reading this... I know last year waterboi was able to "stumble upon" Korinna's blog. Makes me wonder.... hmmmmmm........
Oh well, God should save me from my irresponsible self!
and i still like volleyball although im pretty short =) dun care lah! as long as you can hit, can olredi!
--------i am bestowed with undeserved grace by Someone who died for His enemies, Jesus-------
----there is no god like Him, He alone is the living One I know and believe =)---- ¶ 11:48 PM
Reminds me though. I was really sensitive years ago. I hated it (note the past tense) because it had hurt me so much. I'm hurting myself for no reason and nobody even knows nor cares. I wanted to be cold. It is my defense mechanism. Why should I wallow in pain while I can choose to be a bit colder myself? But then I guess there are times when I have gone overboard...
Prabs told me something which actually caught my attention (not the "hot chick" thing, he calls every girl like that i guess), which was "last year you look nice, but now you look fierce." Familiar. I've been told the similar thing when I was in my 1st and 2nd year high school. And even more familiar, the similarity of me between now and then is my short hair. I probably look assertive or fierce with it. Somehow short hair gives me some boost, it reminds me of my old self. Those happy and sad times. It really reminds me of me...
Anyway, love life. Not that I'm sick bugged with questions like " Do you have a boyfriend?" or "Where's your boyfriend?" but rather I'm tired of answering "No I don't have" and then they'd follow up like "Really?" or "Impossible" or "Sa ganda mong yan?" (no im not bragging im just saying what they were saying but like I said I don't believe them, read the "me" of this blog) "Don't have to keep it as a secret!" or "Sige na share na!". Like ahemm, I'm not like them probably. I'm aloof! I don't like flirting. I still have a lil hang-over of my teenage MH thingy. haha =P and I have other priorities and I have a promise, a promise that can prove that sometimes I do keep my word. I'm bad at promises. So there, I think it is such a common thing for everyone to think that girls or women of my age are involved in this boy-girl relationship... Sometimes it can be annoying but here's what, when I'll have a boyfriend I'll post it here. Those who read then will be one of the first people to know.
One odd thing that parents should take note. When you allow your children to have boyfriends and even encourage it by teasing them, most likely they won't have (that's my case and some people I know) but when you strictly prohibit it, as in totally banned, think again, most likely they already have. The "illegal" boyfriends. I know some too! hahahaha =)
Oh well... I dunno if some A-block people are reading this... I know last year waterboi was able to "stumble upon" Korinna's blog. Makes me wonder.... hmmmmmm........
Oh well, God should save me from my irresponsible self!
and i still like volleyball although im pretty short =) dun care lah! as long as you can hit, can olredi!
--------i am bestowed with undeserved grace by Someone who died for His enemies, Jesus-------
----there is no god like Him, He alone is the living One I know and believe =)---- ¶ 11:48 PM
