Sunday, November 28, 2004
crimson daylight
hehe... pointless title actually... Now, i just realized that the shade of red I like most is crimson.. It is just so not-flashy yet elegant... heeeheee... I like crimson! yeah it may appear pinkish BUT pink is a shade of red anyway... =P and yeah, i like those non-flashy shades of blue... I like the light and the simply darker ones... but the actual blue...err.. it's kinda flashy. what i mean by flashy is that it hurts MY eyes, so it's a biased definition...
so wassup with me?
my mom finally called! she has been trying to call me during my finals, which she usually does before, and in fact, her calls are one of my big sources of inspiration (AS IN). Apparently, this sem I'm not contactable (as a result, I got not much pushy inspirations), thanks to my gross deficit... I actually abhor myself for it...haha... abhor! abhor!...duh =P
yeah... i did abhor myself for not taking such things to account while i carelessly "budgeted" my spendings... Thank God I still got my mom and my super generous aunt, who He used to sustain me. And my nice aunt actually comes from the army--> I just like her job... hehe... I like her job! really!
God provides... Even the seemingly impossible things to get, He gives... How could a poor girl, like for 3 months of her life wear a gold gucci watch? (and lost it eventually =D... hay... i should have sold it for a thousand dollars...hihihi... just kidding) Get a personal laptop at age 17, acquire expensive things that she never brought. (i.e. branded stuff like victoria's secret, LV, levis, etc...) ... Study in a school abroad? NOW, OOOPS YOU STOP THERE! I'm not bragging about them for I do not get my worth from them. I do not even care that much... You see, God provides and there is nothing impossible in Him... If you think of the world and spend your life to get the worldly things you want, you are but wasting your life... Definitely, you will fade with the world. You see, I did not do a thing but the Lord in a way pampers me because I am His child and I hope you are too... But if you are a silly rich kid or a desperate wanna-be, you can think all you want about how cheapskate I am for bragging about those stuff (and even use them as my approach to convince worldly people)... But heck, wealth is really about how contented you are about what you got. I am contended with God... No, that's not it, I am more than provided in Him... Anyway, while you were amassing you're worldly things, did you really find joy in them? As in a lasting joy? If you do, why do you end up throwing them away when they are worn out? I got a God, and a Father who is the same forever more! Enduring joy? Don't make me laugh, it (the enduring word) is not even defined in His "joy dictionary", only eternal.
Heh... I do admit, sometimes I get drowned in the world. The wants and temptations get so overwhelming and I can barely overpower, but then it's normal I believe. Because through them, I may call on my Lord and ask for more of His mercy and grace, and let the Holy Spirit teach me... Learn, then move on... It's not easy, nobody said it is, but it's manageable with my Lord. It's just that IM NOT PERFECT... and compared to the entities surrounding Him, I am utterly nothing...
It's quite depressing to know how imperfect we are. Depressing maybe because we are really bound to be perfect for the One who created us is perfect. We are wired and bound to perfection.
Getting weird eh?
Why do I reason as such? To make an excuse for unanswered doubts? NO. I strongly believe it is just the way we are. It's a basic fact that many people try to deny or simply deny, thanks to the gift of freewill, we can freely think and act all we want. One can laugh about a reasoning Christian like me, don't give an ear to preached gospels, reject people who wants to spread the good news... But here's the news my friends, when we speak we do not really care too much whether everybody accepts the Word (although we really want everybody) or not because only those who listen and receive are the ones from God. They are called. And we speak for them. (I also hope that you are one of them). This is not poisoning the well, this is the truth. Now if you don't believe me... well, it's your choice. Who am I anyway? I just happen to be a blogger who wants everybody be saved... and this is but the means I could do so far.
Now if You are asking me why God in the first place gave us free-will. I think the more proper question to ask is "which love is stronger, that from a robot or from an individual who, given with infinite choices, chose Him?"
Man has fallen short of God's glory. We are sinners and we deserve to be punished and are actually by default destined to suffer for what we have done. But because of God's immeasureable love, He sent His Son as our sacrifice of atonement. A one time offering who is enough to save us all (from the past to the future), if we believe in Him and accept Him as our Savior... Quite a long story though... hehe... but here's what, God placed everything under Jesus' feet until the harvest is done... =)
hehe... I do love my God, my Father at the same time... I may have lost my biological father but I have not lost Him... In fact, I noticed Him after losing the father I thought I only have... thanks to my stubbornness God had to call me that way. I knew the method was something He did not like for me because it's painful, but He sees what's ahead. The long-term results outweigh the means. I somehow have a good understanding of why things turned out that way. Now, I'm glad that at least I heard His call before He had to take away more... I just pray I wont get too stubborn again, despite all His obvious doings in my life, to turn away from Him...
He is the Wisest Father ever!
¶ 3:58 AM
so wassup with me?
my mom finally called! she has been trying to call me during my finals, which she usually does before, and in fact, her calls are one of my big sources of inspiration (AS IN). Apparently, this sem I'm not contactable (as a result, I got not much pushy inspirations), thanks to my gross deficit... I actually abhor myself for it...haha... abhor! abhor!...duh =P
yeah... i did abhor myself for not taking such things to account while i carelessly "budgeted" my spendings... Thank God I still got my mom and my super generous aunt, who He used to sustain me. And my nice aunt actually comes from the army--> I just like her job... hehe... I like her job! really!
God provides... Even the seemingly impossible things to get, He gives... How could a poor girl, like for 3 months of her life wear a gold gucci watch? (and lost it eventually =D... hay... i should have sold it for a thousand dollars...hihihi... just kidding) Get a personal laptop at age 17, acquire expensive things that she never brought. (i.e. branded stuff like victoria's secret, LV, levis, etc...) ... Study in a school abroad? NOW, OOOPS YOU STOP THERE! I'm not bragging about them for I do not get my worth from them. I do not even care that much... You see, God provides and there is nothing impossible in Him... If you think of the world and spend your life to get the worldly things you want, you are but wasting your life... Definitely, you will fade with the world. You see, I did not do a thing but the Lord in a way pampers me because I am His child and I hope you are too... But if you are a silly rich kid or a desperate wanna-be, you can think all you want about how cheapskate I am for bragging about those stuff (and even use them as my approach to convince worldly people)... But heck, wealth is really about how contented you are about what you got. I am contended with God... No, that's not it, I am more than provided in Him... Anyway, while you were amassing you're worldly things, did you really find joy in them? As in a lasting joy? If you do, why do you end up throwing them away when they are worn out? I got a God, and a Father who is the same forever more! Enduring joy? Don't make me laugh, it (the enduring word) is not even defined in His "joy dictionary", only eternal.
Heh... I do admit, sometimes I get drowned in the world. The wants and temptations get so overwhelming and I can barely overpower, but then it's normal I believe. Because through them, I may call on my Lord and ask for more of His mercy and grace, and let the Holy Spirit teach me... Learn, then move on... It's not easy, nobody said it is, but it's manageable with my Lord. It's just that IM NOT PERFECT... and compared to the entities surrounding Him, I am utterly nothing...
It's quite depressing to know how imperfect we are. Depressing maybe because we are really bound to be perfect for the One who created us is perfect. We are wired and bound to perfection.
Getting weird eh?
Why do I reason as such? To make an excuse for unanswered doubts? NO. I strongly believe it is just the way we are. It's a basic fact that many people try to deny or simply deny, thanks to the gift of freewill, we can freely think and act all we want. One can laugh about a reasoning Christian like me, don't give an ear to preached gospels, reject people who wants to spread the good news... But here's the news my friends, when we speak we do not really care too much whether everybody accepts the Word (although we really want everybody) or not because only those who listen and receive are the ones from God. They are called. And we speak for them. (I also hope that you are one of them). This is not poisoning the well, this is the truth. Now if you don't believe me... well, it's your choice. Who am I anyway? I just happen to be a blogger who wants everybody be saved... and this is but the means I could do so far.
Now if You are asking me why God in the first place gave us free-will. I think the more proper question to ask is "which love is stronger, that from a robot or from an individual who, given with infinite choices, chose Him?"
Man has fallen short of God's glory. We are sinners and we deserve to be punished and are actually by default destined to suffer for what we have done. But because of God's immeasureable love, He sent His Son as our sacrifice of atonement. A one time offering who is enough to save us all (from the past to the future), if we believe in Him and accept Him as our Savior... Quite a long story though... hehe... but here's what, God placed everything under Jesus' feet until the harvest is done... =)
hehe... I do love my God, my Father at the same time... I may have lost my biological father but I have not lost Him... In fact, I noticed Him after losing the father I thought I only have... thanks to my stubbornness God had to call me that way. I knew the method was something He did not like for me because it's painful, but He sees what's ahead. The long-term results outweigh the means. I somehow have a good understanding of why things turned out that way. Now, I'm glad that at least I heard His call before He had to take away more... I just pray I wont get too stubborn again, despite all His obvious doings in my life, to turn away from Him...
He is the Wisest Father ever!
¶ 3:58 AM
